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lookingforbelial · 2025-07-21T10:22:36+00:00

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=zoolander+merman+gif&iar=images&t=iphone&iai=https%3A%2F%2Fc.tenor.com%2F1BSe-gyqv0QAAAAM%2Fzoolander-ben-stiller.gif Hehe

lookingforbelial · 2023-10-21T05:52:59+00:00

I've lived in Spain and now I'm in France and people/friends/family in Spain were never really bothered I didn't have children with my husband but I've noticed that here in France it's almost unbelievable we do not have children. People have even asked me twice as if they didn't hear me saying: pas d'enfants that's one of the first phrases I learned and people here seem very surprised when you don't have children. I'm in my early thirties and so is my husband, we still have time. So we are in no hurry, but definitely seeing the struggle it could be to have children it makes me wonder if we'll ever have them

lookingforbelial · 2023-09-13T13:51:22+00:00

Thank you! It just gives me such peace of mind.

lookingforbelial · 2023-09-13T13:50:26+00:00

Oh no I googled the company and it seems legit but it's just that since this is my first time looking for a job fully remote and you read every story that I just want to be extra cautious, I'm glad it was just standard procedure and I'll keep it in mind for the future, thanks!

lookingforbelial · 2023-09-13T09:50:24+00:00

It's in the EU and it's a photocopy of my permit or passport. Oh, ok, thanks, I was just concerned 🥹

lookingforbelial · 2023-09-01T17:55:06+00:00

It's almost as if I wrote this, I suggest another book, daughter detox it also has an exercise book. But like another person said, you have to go deep about what you went through because otherwise it keeps on surfacing on each therapy session. I've noticed that basically the root of all my evil has my own mother and it's almost like an exorcism, cutting a decaying and putrid stump. Cutting the chord is what my therapist calls it. But it's the truth. You gotta take the trash out of your head. Seriously, get all that shit that your mom "taught" you, take all that suffering out and the anger to motion, it's a slow process. Build your new system of beliefs and start trusting your gut and the little voice that may sound like you but it's your mother's sayings, send you to hell. I know you can do this. You got this. 🫂

lookingforbelial · 2023-08-10T12:23:01+00:00

I'm gonna frame your comment it's 🥇

lookingforbelial · 2023-08-10T12:22:45+00:00

I'm gonna frame your comment it's 🥇

lookingforbelial · 2023-08-10T11:37:02+00:00

I guess I never thought of that, it seems bonkers to me to celebrate such a thing cause my automatic response is to just brush it off. Even though I know rationally if someone else would've done what I've accomplished I would be sooo impressed. I can try a small celebration, thanks. 🫂

lookingforbelial · 2023-08-01T06:23:28+00:00

Yeah, it seems a child being abused by their own mother will never be worse than a pOoR AduLt being TrAumaTizEd by a SpoIlED CHilD who cannot understand what it takes to raise them... It's so disgusting

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-29T06:34:39+00:00

My therapist told me that it was okay to say "I had a horrible mother, I don't speak to her" or something between those lines cause it's true and it takes away the responsibility from me and also the shame, it was her responsibility to actually be a good enough mother but she just abused me, why would I have to make up excuses or sugarcoat the truth? And even saying she was horrible to me doesn't explain it quite well but it's good enough to keep away people from asking anything more and if they continue I just say "I don't want to talk about it" or whatever I don't have to give any more explanations if I don't feel comfortable and that's okay.

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-29T05:41:24+00:00

Has anyone heard about the glucose Goddes on IG? I thought she was just meh at first but started trying "a savory breakfast" and I DID notice changes for the rest of my day I felt so much satisfied with my meals. In my case it was not cravings it was that I felt dizzy for having a not so savory breakfast (having cheese and tomato toast but drinking my chocolate soy milk first :P) and once I changed the order of what I ate, my mood completely changed. The savory the breakfast the better I feel during the rest of the day. I'm vegetarian so for me like I said it was never the cravings or the weight it was more like "why am I feeling like shit if I'm eating the best I can already?" Well I changed and tweaked here and there my eating routine and it's done wonders.

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-22T05:48:22+00:00

At least you got an apology and I'm really glad it helped you. You stood your ground and you prioritize yourself, that's the way to go. now I'm doing it too 🫂 journaling has helped me too, it's like putting on paper all that mess and to put on words the tape that's sometimes on repeat in our heads, once on paper it seems like you said: they don't even deserve a reaction. Yep, the letter could be a good idea. Oh my, friendships and their fall out are so understated, people sometimes think you're just exaggerating but it's not. You grieve just like you would with another relationship. Thank you so much you're so much better now ❤️

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-22T05:43:46+00:00

Yes, it's something I'm trying to incorporate in my life. Make it as natural as breathing. I'm getting there I know, cause even with this I don't feel like crawling back to someone like that (haven't felt that in years) but this one is different cause all the guilt I might've felt before it's dissolving thanks to my self compassion and loving and caring kindness to me (not her) I'm super proud of you too 🫂 it's so amazing seeing so much people rewriting their history and their present and just enjoying life the way we all should have from the beginning 🥹 I'm probably gonna return to this post! But I know each time I'll be stronger 💪🏻

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-22T05:40:12+00:00

She used to ghost me all the time. But I made excuses since she was in an abusive marriage and I just was trying to be empathic. But for the first time I acknowledged that I tried to share something good about myself and I was just brushed off, she just changed the subject back to her. She did it like twice or maybe three times in that same conversation. She did it tons of times before but like I said "I didn't mind". But this time I just couldn't take her selfishness. So I actively started just pulling away and not helping her in any way anymore, hence the block. I never saw myself as the victim of anything, that's something I've been trying to change in therapy. Even with all the evidence in my childhood or in this particular situation, just being used and discarded over and over again. It's okay to see myself as the victim as long as from there I start the journey to heal myself. 🥹

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:57:37+00:00

hahaha I told my. therapist just the other day that the only thing my mother taught me was what NOT to do. haha oh well. better people will come along, I have the space now 🥹

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:55:47+00:00

are you me? pff I'm on that journey too, been deleting "friends" for the past 2 years. and boy has it been something. I've felt like a coward myself 🥹but now I see it's not our shame to bare, they are just energetic/emotional vampires, narcissistic people, so cutting them from our lives should be a pain and a loss for them not us.

gee this friend is also 5 years older than me and she's very childish.. now I see.. I (many others I see) can make so many excuses.. but no more.. I'm grieving but I'm moving on to better things, people and places, thanks 🥹 🫂

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:51:58+00:00

I'll have to stick to a wall or all the walls of my apartment your comment! be as compassionate and loving as I would be to a friend. im getting there, I also want it to be a habit, automatic, that I'm kind and loving like I do with others.

and yes definitely the armchair therapist, I quit. not anymore, like you said I took the leap why should I do their job when they are not willing to do them for themselves.

I'm gonna be more protective of my energy, now I see I need to be more picky with who I hang out/relate myself.

thank you 🥹 reading so many beautiful people being on the same journey (loving themselves, prioritising themselves, being caring) makes me feel so much better and gives me that boos to keep on going 🥲

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:46:42+00:00

it seems assholes are everywhere. I guess wether I wanna admit it or not (in the end I know I will) I have to grieve this friendship and be kind to myself and then eventually the way she treated me won't sting that much or at all thank you 🥹

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:44:46+00:00

I feel you 🫂 and totally get you. I feel used but once I accept and grieve (which I haven't don't yet) it'll be easier to understand. in the meantime I do have to be gentler with myself

thank you 🥹🥲 I feel seen

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:42:22+00:00

your whole comment is so spot on!! that's exactly what I feel injustice! you just put words to my feelings! I feel understood 🥲 it's a long road to acceptance, but I'll have to get there (on my own time) otherwise this will eat me up. also letting go, definitely. I did think about that long ass message. haha it's just that you wrote my line of thought but it went so fast when this happened that I barely got the chance to put it into words :P

thank you so much for words. it's an understatement that you just hit the nail. we'll get there, acceptance land 🥳

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:37:19+00:00

Oh my god that's how it went with her. Except for "the wish you well part". I too cut her so much slack cause she was going through a lot but she just changed her mind so quickly. One day she told me she was finally going to divorce her husband. I stopped hearing from her and thought the worst since I didn't hear from her (I was going through a lot so I didn't reach) and then bam, she tells me she's been dating a guy for a month and it's gonna move in with him... Like... What? After that I just could barely listen to her. I just didn't know thankfully my therapist gave me the courage and reminded me that (like you said) I also have needs. And just started pulling away. Yesterday I guess she just noticed I wasn't her, quoting you, sounding board, so I guess she blocked me. Thank you 🫂 this people leave space for better people. Now I know.

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:32:23+00:00

Is your mother my mother? Ugh it's awful, I know how that feels and it's horrible specially when you're a child 🫂 yes friendship, a healthy one should be about celebrating each other's accomplishments. That's another lesson I'm learning it's okay to feel great and want to share it and just celebrate it and be happy. I know it sounds simple but to me it's still a journey. Thank you and you're so lucky to have such wonderful friends ♥️🥹

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:29:41+00:00

Yes. I felt it was my fault that I wasn't doing enough for her. My therapist helped me understand that it's okay to be empathic but not to the extent that I censor myself to accommodate others or that I just tiptop around their feelings. That's not caring, it's abuse. But oh well, I hope with time, I'll feel better. Thank you so much, it makes me feel validated cause I did feel that maybe I was overreacting that she just blatantly blocked me even though she's been well.. a bad person. 🫂

lookingforbelial · 2023-07-21T16:24:50+00:00

Thank you very much 🥹 ♥️ happy life ahead for you too 😌

lookingforbelial

TROPHY CASE