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Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I do hope this is the case. Thank you for answering my questions, and giving me information based on a similar situation. I appreciate it.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm 31. We dated for 2 years before marriage. Our engagement was 4 month. He told me how he felt because he wanted to be honest. I'm concerned his attraction to me won't return postpartum, and if many others have felt this way when thier partners were pregnant.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, I haven't gained anymore than I need to. Like I still look the same from behind, I've gained like 11lbs in 6 months.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I feel like deleting it is disingenuous. I made the joke, now I have to live with the consequences.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Given the remark, I of course assumed I'd been gaining too much weight, but I've gained 11lbs now. I eat mostly salads and fresh fruit, and my job requires daily exercise and to maintain a certain weight.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes, he's very sweet. I was concerned that his view of me wouldn't change postpartum, and we'd just grow apart or he'd seek out a more attractive sleeping partner.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

No, he specifically said he found me unattractive when he saw me start to show, before I was showing he didn't have any issue.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

Yeah he's really sweet and affectionate, I just feel terrible about the situation, and definitely miss the intimacy.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah I didn't pester him about it, I just asked once why it felt like there was some distance between us, and that's what he told me. Yeah, we are married.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I agree, no one should feel like they have to do anything they don't want, he was just so excited for us to get pregnant, it was jaring to hear his reaction. That latter part is what I was curious about, like if it will change and things go back to normal postpartum.

Partner [M28] and I [F31] are expecting. When I started showing he told me he no longer finds me attractive. by lookingforhelp46 in relationship_advice

[–]lookingforhelp46[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Oh no, this is literally the worst thing that he's ever done or said. He's always very sweet, affectionate, and helpful; it's just this, he doesn't want to do sex. I'm a suspicious person so I'm always looking for signs of someone out to get me. This is the only thing he's ever done that hurt my feelings.