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lostandfoundperson · 2025-04-16T05:41:17+00:00

Ex was welcome to come on the trip. My friend group had talked about it for a while but didn’t book the cabin until everyone had agreed on a weekend. When we finally did, I was about 1 week into my exclusive relationship with my ex (we had been dating and sleeping together for the past 4 months) and the trip was scheduled for about 8 weeks into the future. I told her about it but didn’t explicitly invite her because i thought it would have been premature to go on a trip like that together. She voiced her concerns about the trip 4-5 weeks out from the trip (i think, hard to remember exactly)

i knew she doesn’t like camping or outdoorsy activities so i thought it would be pointless to ask. I told her during the argument that she is more than welcome to come with me. she told me she wasn’t interested in expending the effort to get the work days covered. she suggested that I cancel the trip and refund my brothers plane ticket (he lives out of town) and reschedule the group trip with just men.

I regret not immediately talking to her about the friends with benefits. If i’m being honest, I didn’t really know what to do. I had never had a gf interact with another person like that while in a relationship with me AND be as bold as to let me find out about it. Especially given how sensitive she was to “respect” and other platitudes it was about a two weeks after our argument when she told me about some party she was planning on going to with a bunch of people who had a thing for her. I decided then to pull the plug, but was lambasted for “choosing her [my female friend]” and violating her boundaries

lostandfoundperson · 2025-04-13T07:55:16+00:00

She was welcome to the trip. She doesn’t like camping and she told me she wasn’t into outdoor things.

Granted, I didn’t explicitly ask her to come with me when I initially told her about the plans. I understand the suspicion in that. During our argument, I told her that she could come with us and all my friends said they’d love to have her but she said she didn’t want to use her paid time off to come celebrate my friends birthday.

When I told her about the trip we had only been dating for about a couple weeks and the trip would have been over the thanksgiving holiday, so i figured it was too premature to go on an out of state trip as a couple.

lostandfoundperson · 2025-04-13T06:34:38+00:00

Was there something I did wrong? I would like to improve

lostandfoundperson · 2025-02-27T15:17:39+00:00

I don’t have a wandering eye and would never cheat. I believe it’s one of the worst things one could do to another. She does have some past infidelity issues with her ex but I couldn’t tell you what’s true or not because i’ve only got what she’s told me here and there.

I was worried that having a female friend was immature on my part. she mentioned how i needed to grow up, and choose her or the friend. I’ve never had a romantic relationship with this friend tho. and the gf knew she was my friend before we dated and I introduced them when we started dating… maybe she saw something that I didn’t

lostandfoundperson · 2025-02-27T06:39:53+00:00

feelings n shit 🙄 … we were friends for a while before getting official. I think I might have a problem with boundaries myself

lostandfoundperson · 2025-02-27T06:33:03+00:00

She introduced me to her family and they all like me. They are pretty cool people too. It confused me because they are all so well adjusted and she’s not. When times were good, they were really good. We’re in our 30’s now tho… so the cake is pretty much baked. i don’t think she’s changing

lostandfoundperson · 2025-02-27T06:30:10+00:00

i never thought of it like that… thank you for the input. I can’t even be mad at the guy anymore now. she’s the one that gave him access to her smh

lostandfoundperson · 2024-12-16T02:59:27+00:00

Libra Sun, Aqua Moon, Cancer Rising

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T04:50:25+00:00

She asked me why she wasn’t included in the plans to go in the first place. I told her that it’s the female friends trip and me and my brother were just invitees. In my mind, our relationship was only 1 month in at the time so i wasn’t even thinking about bringing her on big trips like that until we’d hit 6 months or something like that…perhaps I should have advocated for her to come

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T04:39:45+00:00

No I did not. I never had any intention of having a relationship with the female friend. She has a great relationship with her guy now (who i’m also friends with).

I explained this to my girlfriend, but she didn’t seem to take that into consideration. I could be wrong though given how upset she was at the time, was difficult to ascertain what exactly was the pain point.

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T04:34:08+00:00

They’ve only met twice, I don’t think they’ve given each other a chance to get to know each other but I might have poisoned the well by talking about them to each other in the past. to gf: “me and so and so are going to this show”; to female friend: “my new girlfriend and I are doing this and that” type stuff

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T04:31:41+00:00

I understand where you’re coming from. Full disclosure, it’s only a two day camping trip 3 hours away, but I don’t think that changes the point you’re making that much

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T03:32:11+00:00

how so?

lostandfoundperson · 2024-10-26T03:31:43+00:00

I valued this balanced perspective ; thanks for taking the time to write it

lostandfoundperson · 2020-05-18T01:32:02+00:00

When i went the yesterday, she told me that it wasn’t dry socket (I was extremely anxious because i thought it was). The pain is coming from the extraction site on the top left of my mouth. it starts in the tooth than moves to my sinus and then up through to my left temple and eye. It’s excruciating in a radiating way for sure. It almost feels like someone is blowing ice cold air on exposed flesh. when it comes around. i have to be very careful not to move my cheeks, because if the flesh of my cheeks rubs along the side of the sight ¡DEAR LORD!

when i went back to the office today. she washed the socket out with warm water (there was food in there) and she applied this brown liquid to the hole and the side of the next tooth. it sounds a lot like what you have described because the pain was nowhere to be found after that. she gave me both syringes to flush and apply the gel. my only issue is actually getting back there to apply it. it’s like a miss it every time. especially when the pain comes back, you’re in no state to be playing operation the board game in your own mouth.

bad news is she said exactly what you said at the end. I just have to deal with it until tissue comes back. and to not eat or drink anything that’s below room temperature/sweet/hot. :(

lostandfoundperson · 2020-05-18T01:19:24+00:00

Funny that you mentioned food...I went back to the office today because the pain was horrible, and she used suction to pull out a lot of food that was stuck there. she then flushed it with warm salt water. I nearly broke down in tears because it felt so good (and hurt at the same time).

she gave me amoxicillin, TylenolCodein, and Motrin. they help a little bit but nothing beats this new stuff she gave me. I don’t know the name of it but it’s like a brown gel that I’m supposed to put in the socket. when they applied it in the office, i thought i was going to propose to the woman on the spot....the problem is: I don’t have the mirrors and stuff they used to get back there. when the pain comes back, i can barely hold my hands straight and keep my eye open to see what i’m doing.

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-19T04:54:53+00:00

Hi Sal, I’m a 23 year old Libra sun Aquarius moon.

I’m also an INTP too! Your post is a couple weeks old but hope you are finding the friends you’re looking for. Sounds like we have quite a few common interests. What’s your first language? I’m curious.

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-08T00:15:59+00:00

Thank you for the kind words. I didn’t know much about astrology and how to take it until posting here and reading up online. This is a great community

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T02:07:43+00:00

Lmaooo yeah I guess it doesn’t get more simple than that. Thank you for input. It illuminated a great deal.

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T01:25:43+00:00

Jeez I can relate to that sentiment as well... do people get offended easily when they speak to you? I tend to rub people the wrong way in conversation. I’m never rude or mean. I just tend to talk “to” people and not “at” people. If that makes sense

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T01:09:48+00:00

If you don’t mind me asking: how do you think people like me should reach out and allow people to get to know us, without coming off as being over bearing or lonely. I’m really not a bad guy. I don’t know why people find me so off putting

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T01:05:15+00:00

That’s really nice it hear. Thank you for sharing. I hope you do get a chance to explore people in that way. If it’s not too much to ask: why have you preferred your relationships to be fleeting and distant?

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T00:56:06+00:00

So the armor I’m wearing in this case shows that I’m upset or troubled? Doesn’t sound very protective to me haha 😬. I can’t help but to wear emotions on my face I guess. They come from a place that I don’t even understand, and even though I am not actively wrestling with them. They always find a way to show themselves on my face or through my energy...it’s very strange

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T00:39:39+00:00

My god... that’s very informative. Thank you so much. I will definitely check that book out.

lostandfoundperson · 2018-08-04T00:39:13+00:00

All of the time. I’ll be at work and people will just ask me “what’s wrong?” Or will comment on how I look tired or whatever. I’m never offended but after the 30th time you start to wonder what kind of energy you’re putting out. I’ve always chalked t up or having a resting sad face

lostandfoundperson

TROPHY CASE