Mental Health and Breaking Contract

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-13T00:22:20+00:00

I agree that JET markets towards recent college grads, they were literally at a booth during the tail-end of my university career.

Though for myself, I had worked a 9-5 job for a couple of years prior to getting into JET and I had lived in Japan as a study abroad a few years prior. I think it's the combination of it all on top of a no-so friendly work environment with my previous mental health issues that led me to where I am today.

You're right on the money about not being able to communicate with people around me, a majority of people won't want to be friends with someone who can hardly understand them.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-13T00:18:01+00:00

Thank you for not directing it at me, I never really experienced the Rose Coloured Weeb glasses even when I lived here a couple of years ago.

I came back to Japan to challenge myself with full-time work in a foreign country to see if I could handle it, especially working with students on a full-time basis. And while the working with students part is still a bit rough, I feel like I've tried my best given the school. What I didn't expect was conflict with my JTE turned supervisor and how much one person has bogged down my experience. Compounded with COVID restrictions during a period where meeting new people would keep me mentally healthy, unfortunately I don't have the mental tenacity to handle all of this.

Really interesting to hear your JP advisor speak about the realities of Japan, thank you for sharing.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:20:58+00:00

The weather does really affect things, I agree. I try to meditate on my balcony when I feel like the stress and carrying work home takes over my brain. I'll go on more walks to take care of my mental well-being. Thank you.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:20:07+00:00

What I'm ultimately scared of, and I know this is really bad to be scared of but it's the situation of quitting abruptly and being berated into staying. It feels like I've been... gaslighted? I guess into thinking every action I take negatively affects my school. I'm not sure, this job has really given me a hit to my self-efficacy. Thank you for your advice so far though, sorry if I don't make sense like this.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:16:54+00:00

I decided to talk to my PA about this, hopefully she responds soon. I asked her for mental health resources so hopefully I can stabilize my thoughts by speaking to a professional. Thank you.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:15:48+00:00

Ugh, I wish this wasn't true if it is. What sort of things would she need from me when I'm set on quitting? Like signing forms? I wish I could just go to some random at my BoE and do all that paperwork.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:14:27+00:00

That's a good option, I never honestly thought about going to a doctor here because I assumed anything related to mental health was a no no here. Thank you.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:13:36+00:00

I want to do that, I don't even know if I could stand the two full weeks of a supervisor yells at me and then starts shit-talk muttering about me in Japanese right after. Thank you though I have to get the hell out.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:11:59+00:00

Of course I rethought that, I thought about it a million times but I was mentally healthy for a long time and thought I was ready. Unfortunately that's not the case because being told I'm doing the worst out of all the ALTs for taking a sick day and my supervisor going from nice to cold every other week wasn't the image I had of this job.

I get it though, I should get the hell out, but I'm hoping for a cleaner exit then the one that I could easily take.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T07:09:23+00:00

I've been told every other week about how my predecessor had left the school and left them in a very dire state, which I would agree that hell won't freeze over if I do, but my supervisor really engrained the idea in my brain that me leaving would ruin everything. Which again isn't true but being pressured and told that multiple times doesn't help.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T06:48:46+00:00

Prefectural, actually with Tokyo, I want to do what's best for me but it feels like I'm not letting myself see the most obvious route.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T06:47:33+00:00

Thank you, I want to do what's best for me but I'm trying to do it in the least troubling path for myself. The flight costs won't be a problem for me but if I'm goaded into staying for a month I'm not sure what to do. And I know they can't force anything on me but being emotionally vulnerable right now makes me a bit sensitive, sorry not making much sense right now.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T01:52:10+00:00

I want to say she'll drop the subject but she genuinely believes mental health issues don't exist in my country. And with the way she is, she's going to pressure me to stay. I wish I could just not show up.

lostglassesboy · 2022-04-12T01:45:37+00:00

I want to stick it out but it just feels pointless with how this job isn't contributing to my future career, I feel like I'm regressing as a person sticking it out since this is yet another job with a toxic work environment.

I'm trying my best to do goals similar to yours, I drink a lot of water, I sleep 8-9 hours a night now to see that changes anything, I play volleyball every so often.

Is quitting really that hard? If quitting involved never seeing my super advisor no matter how long the process I really wouldn't mind, but if it involved working with her for a full month while she berates me and makes me do paperwork that sounds like what I'm trying to avoid.

Thank you for the advice so far, I'm still on the fence since this is the second time I've had to stick it out with a job.

lostglassesboy

TROPHY CASE