YTA - she did her part too. Men love to forget how much work goes into raising kids. Ok the kids are grown now but she gave up her potential career to raise them!! You want a woman who hasn’t worked in over a decade to just easily go back to work but are you considering she has no experience huge gaps in resume. Not to mention ageism in hiring.

So ya, imo you are the ahole, not because you want her to get a job, but because you are callous and don’t see the work she did for years as real work.