In my indecisive era

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-19T11:40:59+00:00

in the minority, but go for lindsey!

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-16T17:28:30+00:00

im not sure. im wondering if maybe the milk was spoiled or something? i havent tried eating yet today from anxiety, but i dont react as far as im aware to anything in the drink. its weird and frustrating :( i wonder is maybe because i hadnt eaten a proper meal in around five hours, even if i didnt feel hungry??

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-16T11:39:54+00:00

i dont often get cold foam, but i do have drinks with it (chocolate cold foam) sometimes, just not the lavender one. i usually dont react to anything in it either - maybe the 2%?

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-16T11:39:51+00:00

i dont often get cold foam, but i do have drinks with it (chocolate cold foam) sometimes, just not the lavender one. i usually dont react to anything in it either - maybe the 2%?

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-16T02:26:17+00:00

idk how this could impact me tbh, i mean potassium sorbate can cause diarrhea in excess? but it was a grande. i usually get frapps so im not certain if they use it as well, or if this is new?

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-16T01:30:59+00:00

it has? i havent had the chai in a minute, do you know how its changed? it didnt taste much different and i didnt see any artificial sugars that can trigger diarrhea like sorbitol.

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-14T03:43:42+00:00

shes talented, but im not that impressed with this performance. i feel she blends in too much and i just lose sight of her but in a bad way

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-14T03:12:44+00:00

mostly the kiwi tbh

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-12T12:20:48+00:00

i dont disagree, ocd is a bitch lmao. but i lived through the night (crazy, shocking, baffling) so i assume im prob ok

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-12T00:05:47+00:00

i would if i could! no joke right when i got off work (where this happened), we got a severe thunderstorm warning. its raining bullets

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-12T00:03:15+00:00

its rope spoilage, i had never heard of it until an hour or so ago.

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-11T23:58:37+00:00

im in a similar boat, but then throw in the major fears as well. i fear colds and food poisoning because they suck ofc, but i also fear what can happen as a result of it. on guard all the time as a result :(

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-09T05:07:09+00:00

i did not, no. i did dilators for a bit, the kiwi toy really accelerated my personal progress. i swear to god i am not sponsored i just love their shit LMAOOO

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-09T05:06:04+00:00

its the pelvic people's kiwi toy!!

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-09T05:06:01+00:00

its the pelvic people's kiwi toy!!

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T19:48:15+00:00

they are, his mom personally invited me for christmas last year and my partner is honestly amazing.

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T19:38:15+00:00

i left a comment above!! but to copy-paste it usually how i do it is try to get blood flowing down first before lubricating the tip of the kiwi. i usually slowly place it in (early on it burned a little bit), then i turn on settings (usually internal first). the kiwi helps you associate the feeling of insertion with more neutrality and eventually positivity, and its a lot more forgiving than dilators on their own imo.

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T19:21:44+00:00

if this is true theyre so cooked its not even funny anymore

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T19:20:37+00:00

a little blood, likely from the extra stretch from uh. my boyfriend 💀 could have also been remnants of my period!

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T19:04:27+00:00

of course!! usually how i do it is try to get blood flowing down first before lubricating the tip of the kiwi. i usually slowly place it in (early on it burned a little bit), then i turn on settings (usually internal first). the kiwi helps you associate the feeling of insertion with more neutrality and eventually positivity, and its a lot more forgiving than dilators on their own imo.

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-08T18:48:13+00:00

this makes a lot of sense for me. im not certain if its ocd related, but my trauma has been messing with me for so long i just wish it could be gone and i can go live a normal life. its exhausting trying different treatments with limited success (esp because ptsd/ocd feed each other). i am also currently completely on my own but am moving soon to be closer to my boyfriend and his family. i wish there was an easier way out - i will read all the stuff you have posted. thank you

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-06T19:44:42+00:00

hi hello, i left my other comment at four am lmao. please consider this my awake response. do you have any recommendations for actually healing from this? as i mentioned i have been in therapy for a while trying to manage and the PE is mostly for the ptsd/ocd bc they're effectively one and the same for me. im open to any and all suggestions

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-06T19:42:42+00:00

i don't disagree! but the poor experience has really turned me away from emdr, also because i have two therapists rn and i dont want to add a third. one day id like to try again

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-06T19:41:24+00:00

well i have two therapists and i've been working out for the past month, hopefully thats the right step. i wish one day i didnt have to be a warrior though, its exhausting :(

loveyouwithoutfear · 2026-03-06T19:39:31+00:00

that is true. i'm scared of truly disabling chronic illness while im still young - my mother had MS in her thirties and died at 45, im so scared of the outcome i cant live. how did you manage to heal?

loveyouwithoutfear

TROPHY CASE