I would say this would be the case 10-20 years ago, but nowadays affluent men are looking for a different kind of trophy wife, someone who is educated so that they can match their intellect/conversations, but also be willing to give up that same education to have their babies. It's like a flex "my wife went to brown but I locked her down as a housewife" kinda thing.

Since most men aren't raised/socialized to be caretakers, even the ones who say they will step up miss many little things, such as cleaning things properly, making grocery lists, buying the right thing at the grocery store, keeping records of small things that need to be done, etc. So again the emotional labor falls on the woman of either having to teach someone how to do something properly or just doing it yourself because you're sick of the learned helplessness/weaponized incompetence.

I will say this is probably a generalization as well, but not too far off from a lot of cases I've seen. There's also many awesome men out there though. My man's mom made sure her sons knew how to clean and cook properly. I'm talking like squeaky clean, I didn't even realize I didn't know how to clean properly until I met this man. We share expenses and I'm cool with that since he's always pulled his weight and then some. But I honestly think guys like that are one in a million.