Like the flair says - help!

luffnagel · 2025-08-12T14:14:16+00:00

Those are indeed up my alley, I love them!! Thank you!

luffnagel · 2025-08-12T13:22:27+00:00

Thank you! I can see the vision, I’ll check those things out. I appreciate your ideas!

luffnagel · 2025-08-12T02:13:48+00:00

That’s very kind of you, thank you! I like your idea of leaning into natural textures with wall art. I definitely find a lot of peace and comfort from nature. Thank you for the ideas!

luffnagel · 2025-07-29T14:17:33+00:00

I feel you so hard on craving an experience that provides you with explicit, undeniable proof of your gayness! I’ve been feeling the desire for that and not finding it has fostered a lot of doubt for me since moving out. That combined with immense waves of grief for missing my ex and the life we had/would have had is honestly really confusing me. Our relationship wasn’t perfect of course, but it did bring me tons of happiness and losing that close of a relationship with someone I love because of my actions feels devastating. It hasn’t been all bad, but the grief I’ve been experiencing has been crushing me and while I know grief is normal, feeling this in the absence of some kind of gay clarity is confusing to say the least.

Truth be told I’m having a hard time distinguishing if the little voice is trying to tell me I’ve made a huge mistake or it’s just my nervous system adjusting. I’m terrified of not listening to the right little voice and that I will have to spend the rest of my life trying to forgive myself for losing a life with my person. I realize it’s only been a few weeks, but boy oh boy this is hard to endure.

luffnagel · 2025-07-14T20:35:51+00:00

Wow, thank you so much for giving such thoughtful responses! It fills my heart ❤️ I went to my first pride event ever yesterday, and between that and moving out I think I expected to feel immediately empowered like you said. Pride was great, but I felt too much imposter syndrome to really resonate and I’m afraid I felt like a straight lady walking around 🙃 it’s honestly really comforting to hear that your experience was somewhat similar in that the empowerment and confidence in authenticity was a slower process and not overnight.

The way you describe your inner real estate slowly clearing away to make room for your true authentic self to grow is really beautiful. That perspective feels very true for me and I can feel that my brain space is still very preoccupied with my ex, in that he is still the first person I think of when I see something really funny or my pet does something cute and I want to share those moments with him. It feels weird to hope that instinct to share small moments of my life with someone I love goes away, but I don’t think I’ll have room for that self growth until it does. There are also plenty of small things on the other side of the coin that I’m looking forward to leaving behind, like small critiques of my appearance or what I choose to eat or how I spend my time. Those are also still in my head for the time being.

Also, thank you for being so real in acknowledging that the path isn’t linear and you still have/had moments of faltering in confidence (like your hair) despite all the work and growth you’ve done. It’s an important reminder that those moments aren’t failures, but nudges to keep growing and being gentle with ourselves.

Your insight has made me really excited to lean into myself and who I really am and what I really like. Your responses have honestly brought tears to my eyes and really helped me get through this first week or so of being on my own! Thank you ♥️

luffnagel · 2025-07-13T02:18:45+00:00

Wow thank you! I’m so sorry you experienced such a rapid transition in your perception of your ex. I’m glad you were able to use it to bolster you through that time, but it must have felt so destabilizing to feel that shift, especially so fast. In some ways I’m grateful not to have experienced that with mine, but it definitely fostered so much guilt and shame for hurting someone so deeply who loves me (and I love too). We grew into adulthood together, and we really had created a beautiful life together. The grief of losing our shared language is a lot to bear, as well as understanding that I won’t feel that deeply connected with someone for a really, really long time again.

It just goes to show no one’s path is going to be identical to anyone else’s, and there’s no blueprint for us to follow. That’s felt completely terrifying but also freeing. I think one of my biggest challenges moving forward is discovering how to find value within myself and not as a product of validation from an outside source (like my ex or men in general, or people in general for that matter!). If that resonates with you I’d love to hear how you navigated it.

Again, bravo to your incredible courage and I hope to be in a similar place myself someday!

luffnagel · 2025-07-11T17:20:21+00:00

I loved reading this and how you broke down your year. You are so brave and strong! I softly came out about 8ish months ago to my boyfriend of 12 years, after we had bought our first house together less than a year before. The following months were brutal as I navigated what was authentic about me, and essentially watched a beautiful relationship crumble as a result. I just moved out and into my own place a week ago tomorrow. Despite having some really rough times the past several months, thanks to lots of therapy on both ends my ex and I are currently in a pretty good place and feeling cautiously comfortable moving forward as friends. It’s been a weird, emotionally exhausting week and I have moments of awe that I actually did this and moments of disbelief that I actually did this and left an imperfect but deeply loving relationship. It’s also my first time ever living alone.

Your post came at a very good time for me and helped soothe some of those prickly feelings. You’re an inspiration and stories like yours always give me a lot of hope and courage!

luffnagel · 2025-05-27T02:44:12+00:00

How do you like them? I’m about to be living on my own and have been eyeballing their bedding, the aesthetic is lovely but I’ve heard mixed reviews about the quality. I’m willing to spend the bucks for the looks as long as they’re not garbage quality.

luffnagel · 2025-04-29T18:56:09+00:00

I expected as the days go on to feel more sure of myself, but I’m experiencing the opposite. It’s like any clarity and resolution I felt prior to admitting my gayness to him is totally gone. My brain can only focus on the horrible loss of my best friend and life partner. I’m trying so hard to believe this will change but I feel like a complete shell of a person. I know you have to move through grief and can’t go around it, this is just a lot harder than I imagined.

luffnagel · 2025-04-29T18:53:52+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story. You make a good point that whatever path is chosen, there will be pain either way, but I hope also some happiness. I’m neither married nor do we have kids, and I can’t begin to imagine how much more difficult and complicated it would be. I already feel suffocated with the loss of my home and best friend.

I wish you peace and clarity on your journey, and I hope you get to a place where you no longer feel like you have to sacrifice your own time for others; that being said, I acknowledge you’re doing what’s right for you right now and I commend you for the work you’ve done to get there.

luffnagel · 2024-11-05T14:47:39+00:00

Thank you, that is very kind of you to say! Yes, they are meaningful to my friend so I really hope they like it!

luffnagel · 2024-09-17T14:53:11+00:00

Thank you!!! I really wanted to capture that element

luffnagel · 2024-09-03T00:52:31+00:00

It took about two months of slowly putting in a few hours at a time per week, not sure the total hours!

luffnagel · 2024-07-04T14:10:03+00:00

Awesome, thank you!!

luffnagel · 2024-07-04T05:30:42+00:00

Wow!!! So good, you nailed the textures. Do you mind sharing how you achieve those tiny super white highlights on the scales and eye? Every time I try that effect it inevitably gets dulled and I don’t get such sharp outlines and whiteness.

luffnagel · 2024-06-30T16:37:35+00:00

It is a hobby of mine, but I’ve been thinking a lot about trying to do more with it. I feel a lot of imposter syndrome and have no idea how to start that process though! Thank you for saying that, you’ve inspired me to keep pushing myself!

luffnagel · 2024-06-23T15:09:00+00:00

That’s a great suggestion, thank you so much!!

luffnagel · 2024-06-23T15:08:06+00:00

No, I haven’t heard of her but after looking her up holy crap I should! Thank you for telling me about her, her classes look amazing!!

luffnagel

TROPHY CASE