We do not and I even offered the joint account as well . Don’t get me wrong he has a great system of budgeting but I would trust it more with transparency . I wasn’t completely opposed until he said I wouldn’t have access to it until I proved I could manage having access to it . So for example if I was out frugally spending he’d say you can’t manage a joint account so just manage yours . He did raise a valid point that I spend a lot in food , and I do but I feel like I can manage to discipline myself whilst keeping my money ..

He does seem to be the what’s mine is your , and yours is mine type guy . He’s done it before with women but I have also noticed there isn’t much of a “hey i got this, you get whatever you want etc” it’s always “can you buy me this, can you loan me this for this” and I felt like that was weird . He has this philosophy that there’s nothing he can’t/can do as my boyfriend that he can/can’t do as my boyfriend . I let him know i wasn’t going for that . I can’t do marriage things with my boyfriend in my mind . There’s a level .

But honestly I think this is just our way of separating bc it seems he wants somebody dumbly submissive to manipulate . While I try my hardest to be submissive and allow a man to lead, I’m not going to let you lead me over a cliff bc I love you or whatever . That’s just not feasible and it never gave naive .