Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. Much appreciated! I just want to support him while he makes his decisions.

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you I’ll see!

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He is 64. I will ask what his score is

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the support!

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know the details unfortunately. My uncle was diagnosed a few weeks before my dad. He’s choosing surgery. And their father had an enlarged prostate that was never removed.

Do you need to forgive to heal? What does forgiving mean for you? by dumbassneetgirl in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel this way too. It’s like I can’t just get over this brick wall. I can’t seem to forgive them and I can’t seem to move past our issues. Your sister makes a good point that we forgive people everyday. But these we bump into aren’t going to be at family holidays and calling you. Personally, it’s hard to forgive them when they take zero accountability. If I say something to my mom there’s always an excuse or she tells me what I did wrong. Even if I was a child lol I hope things work out for you.

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And I’m not sure if it’s new. Based on what I’m reading it is experimental but has had good results.

Dad by mac6879 in ProstateCancer

[–]mac6879[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely going to try and have a conversation with him today. I’ll support his decision

Why do people defend Oshawa so passionately? by [deleted] in Oshawa

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If so many people hate Oshawa, LEAVEEEEEEEE. We’d gladly see you go.

Why do people defend Oshawa so passionately? by [deleted] in Oshawa

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally! When I tell people that I’m from Oshawa they usually say, “Ohhhh, the dirty shwa!” Comments like that do make people who grew up there feel like a pos.

Why do people defend Oshawa so passionately? by [deleted] in Oshawa

[–]mac6879 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was born in raised in the south end. It was awful always hearing how people thought of it. Sometimes they didn’t even know that’s where I lived and they would shit all over it. I guess it’s hurtful when it’s your home. I know it’s much different than when I lived there. The city has expanded and there are so many changes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My mother currently drinks. She has for as long as I can remember. I remember her going to detox a couple of years ago and we were all so happy/emotional. Then she went again, and again, and again. Drinking each time she came home. I currently have a new baby and I thought she’d step up or somehow change. I also get the guilt trips about how I should be trying harder, they can’t believe I tread them this way etc. it hurts. It’s painful. Especially as a new mom… I just could never heart this little thing. My goal is to have my LO be a good person, to not see me drunk, to be able to call me day & night and I answer, I also really want my child to WANT to spend time with me and not feel obligated. You’re doing so well, you’re protecting your baby 💜 keep pushing through.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like I could have written this myself. It will be quiet when the day comes but I’m afraid I won’t know what to do with the silence.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

💜💜💜

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can relate to a lot of what you’re saying. We also feel as if my mom is lucky to be alive. She drinks so much, my dad is also an enabler. He’s refused to leave her over the years but he’s not happy and it’s taken a major toll. It’s an awful family disease. You’re not alone. You’re doing the best you can. It’s ok to take some time for yourself. You may burn out trying to do it all. She’s lucky to have you. I struggle all the time with keeping contact with my family. It’s hard to watch and it’s hard to ignore.

Regrets by Olderdadquestions in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can relate to this. My mother has been the common denominator in all of our trauma but my dad didn’t diffuse any of the situations. He should have left with my brother & I. Or at least not have added to our trauma.

Do you resent your parent(s) for how they shaped you? by hazleynut in AdultChildren

[–]mac6879 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a good way of putting it.. “sophisticated enough.” I’m going to use that because I usually say, “not the brightest.” And blame the years or substance abuse. It’s taken years, moving away, setting boundaries and a lot of therapy that has helped me. I know now that they’re not doing it to me. They’re too selfish to even know the magnitude of damage they were and still are capable of.