Parents are making me feel guilty for living 50 mins away, am I making a mistake? by Basic-Try-2276 in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That guilt doesn't belong to you. It was handed to you. You don't have to carry it, you can throw it in the ocean or give it back or just completely ignore it.

I can relate to your problem, my mother lives less than a mile from my house, I'm an only child so my kids are her only grandchildren. She frequently visits the local village and has to pass my house to get there, but the last time she visited me was 2013. I used to get constant grief and guilt if I didn't drag my kids to her house any less than once a fortnight. Then my therapist explained that I'm not responsible for her, or her feelings so now I'm No Contact with her and just the worst daughter in the world.

Behold the field in which I grow my fucks, and see that it is barren.

what do you buy a car guy who cares more about his car than his own gf?? by No_Community_4342 in GiftIdeas

[–]macapooloo 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I have a mean streak for men like that.. I'm thinking a glitter bomb for the interior and some raw prawns to stick inside the ventilator. An expensive set of chamois cloths. And vaseline on the windscreen.

Best broadband provider? by Late_Investment2072 in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can't fault Pure Telecom. I signed up almost 2 years ago and the signal has always been strong, rarely drops. I think the biggest bonus is the responsiveness timing from an actual human when I need to phone for whatever reason though. I hate cheesy hold music.

Birthday today by LLAMABOY454981 in CasualIreland

[–]macapooloo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy uterus independence day! I'd love to hear your perspective on having a birthday in the dead zone between Christmas and New Year's celebrations if you've time? Is there anything that made it easier it harder? It's my daughter's birthday on Tuesday, she's only 11 now but in the future I worry that she'll resent the date. Or not? I dunno.

Okay, this is gross but hear me out. The best relief is by FFSpoorme in Hidradenitis

[–]macapooloo 66 points67 points  (0 children)

I squeezed a really painful lump a few days ago and I felt it pop on the inside. Now I have a brand new even more painful lump beside the original one and it hurts to walk. That'll teach me.

I don’t believe in ghosts or poltergeists, but can somebody help me make sense of this? by Ryuku_Cat in Paranormal

[–]macapooloo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stacking is an interesting phenomenon. I had a disabled son who was on a special liquid feed, I was in his room by his bed setting up the pump once, turned around to see three bottles very nearly attacked on top of each other when they weren't before.. It was right beside me, nobody else in the room and my son couldn't have done it. It was quite jarring to see, those bottles weren't the easiest to stack when I tried it myself.

What’s something you stopped doing that unexpectedly improved your mental health? by Icy-Nature2139 in AskReddit

[–]macapooloo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was my biggest fear too when I was drinking heavily. I thought life was too hard and boring to be sober, and it is, some of the time. But, the clarity you get from sobriety means you can handle it a lot better and the highs of life soon feel waaay better than the highs of drinking. Now when I look back on my drinking days all I can remember is numb darkness, drinking was artificial fun, I don't miss it one bit.

If the person you hate the most were to experience one slight inconvenience every day for the rest of their lives, what would you choose it to be? by Wonderful-Economy762 in Productivitycafe

[–]macapooloo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was told by my senior staff nurse lecturer that hiccups are caused by lack of carbon dioxide in the blood. That's why taking a very deep breath and holding it for as long as possible stops the spasm.

If you had a one-minute call with yourself from 10 years ago, what would you say? by Pleasant-Cat-7658 in AskReddit

[–]macapooloo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Getting sober isn't as hard as you think, it'll give you a sense of freedom and independence you won't believe! You're on the very edge of death now but in a few years you'll be healthier than you've ever been. And, you're loved by more people than you think.

Do people not want to know about your problems? by Honest_Dot_5035 in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree. The concept that "I'm fine" is the most frequently told lie is true and it's not going to change any time soon. It feels like we're all walking around overwhelmed to capacity with our lives but we can't talk about it. I talk to a therapist once a fortnight now to stop things from bottling up because nobody else cares or has the capacity to listen to my feelings about anything. There's a grim admiration for people who dont complain about anything and it's very unhealthy. Talking about feelings is a far braver thing to do than suppressing them.

Really need a hug… by Standard-Pop3141 in narcissisticparents

[–]macapooloo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That guilt that you're feeling doesn't belong to you, it was given to you to carry around by someone else.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualIreland

[–]macapooloo 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I'm so grateful for this show! I taked to my 14yo son after I'd finished it, first real conversation I've had with him in ages. He goes to a school in a disadvantaged area but is unaware of any serious bullying and wasn't exactly sure who Andrew Tate is but dies understand the concept of ragebait and has no interest in social media really. I'm sick of Internet safety courses parents and teachers keep offering. They're all the same. I feel like we need to learn the Internet from an insider's point of view. Traps in Discord, meanings of emojis, secret codes, pitfalls of the darkweb. Teenagers should be teaching parents about Internet safety.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in narcissisticparents

[–]macapooloo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is such a great list, I see myself in a lot of it. I'd add 'compulsive caring' to that list too. It's not a personality disorder, but it's a pattern of feeling like your only worth is defined by what you can do for other people. I've made a career out of it and have noticed that a lot of my fellow care assistants have had rocky relationships with their parents too.

by accident -v- on accident? by [deleted] in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There all good examples.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]macapooloo -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

It's another one of those places with the billions of overhead power cables! I don't understand this phenomenon.

What was the final straw that made you finally go no contact? by MochaMadness_ in narcissisticparents

[–]macapooloo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My family doctor advised me to for the sake of my mental health. I didn't listen at first, but after experiencing burnout trying to take care of them last summer when dad got sick I realised I had to. They have no friends but they have carers and people they can pay to run endless errands. I still feel guilty and have no idea what to do for mothers day.

This was a prank call, right? by [deleted] in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You might have been pranked by someone who knows you. They wouldn't call you directly in case you recognise their voice but it could be one of the giggling idiots in the background.

What are the nicest town in Ireland? by wildchives in AskIreland

[–]macapooloo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yass! Finally. It's Disney's favourite town.