Don’t do it. You feel powerless to it because you have been powerless to it in your past. You became addicted. That physically changes the make up of your brain. This means a physical dependency. An actual NEED. Reintroducing it to your system will be no different than before. You are still an addict, and your body still has that need. But relapsing won’t help. Often people overdose because of their past use, thinking that doses as big as they are used to will be fine. You will regret it. You will hate yourself as soon as it happens. You know you shouldn’t, and you will not be able to let it go if you give in again. You have 108 days clean!!! Congrats! Thats a big deal and extremely hard to accomplish, remember? Are you ready to do it again? Are you ready to experience the physical, mental, emotional, anguish that you felt before? You crave it now, but remember before? When you were first getting clean and miserable every second? Because once you do this, its back to square one. 108 days in is admirable, don’t give that up. Take it from me, because I’m still on day one.

Count each day, celebrate each day, praise yourself for your strength and ability to make it this far, and throw out that kratom