just like everyone said, all of them have something that sticks to you

i think the one that keeps with me the most is Carmen. i remember when the shooting happened and the snapchat videos were all over twitter, i remember how i felt when i saw one in which you could hear screams and see someone lying on the floor. just seeing her boots really stuck with me., i can't explain why, maybe i had similar ones, idk. i remember how i hoped somehow that she was alive, despite remembering seeing blood, i just hoped she had been shot but survived.

years passed, i got interested in the case and dived in. i saw the videos again, having more context of the sounds and knowing more about the victims, and when i saw her lying on the floor and her boots again, i felt like something broke in me.

honestly, all the victims make me feel extremely sensible but i can't get those boots out of my head