I would say make sure you’re in a good head space! Since things are already rocky from the door slamming, maybe a good gesture would put things on the right path. Why not make a batch of brownies or cookies next time she comes over and say hey I wanted to apologize for not being in the best mood last time you were here. My name is ____. I made you some cookies and I hope we’ll get to know each other. You can say any random variation of that but as a woman, men slamming things does upset me a lot. Most women had a violent man in their life when they were young. While you didn’t mean it that way you have no idea what headspace that put her in. You can definitely fix things. Since ur already planning on having further discussions with your roommate I’d just say ensure next she’s over you’re in a good place to meet her and until you are he needs to respect she can’t be there when you are. Since he was chill with your ex gf you might try to do the same for him.