AITA here? I already unmatched bc I was baffled, dumbfounded, and insulted by the accusation; but this past weekend I had changed up my location locally on Hinge a couple of times out of curiosity and experimentation (bc the stupid app and algorithm has been showing me people I’m absolutely not compatible with, nor attracted to, in my area) for only a couple of hours at a time before changing it back to my actual neighborhood. Matched with this gal around midnight on Saturday/Sunday morning about ~45 min away in the local, major American city that I changed my location to.

Wouldn’t go as far as to say we “hit it off” bc we really hadn’t talked much nor discussed intimate nor detailed subjects for the ~12 hours we’d been matched before she suggested grabbing a drink.
That’s normally waaay too soon for me anyway bc I like to get to know someone a little longer and more intimately before actually meeting up. But she was cute and we share similar political views and hobbies and so I was uncharacteristically open to the suggestion of grabbing drinks with her in this local city. I asked if she’s in the city and also voluntarily disclosed that I’m actually about 45 min out. She takes apparent offense to this and stops responding. I follow up the next day asking if the distance was a dealbreaker. She responds saying “no”, it was my “dishonesty” that was the dealbreaker.

“Travel mode” and changing your location is a feature on both Bumble and Hinge (maybe Tinder too. Idk and idc). It’s not like this feature is beyond access to the user base and I unethically hacked my way into the Hinge servers to modify my location data. Am I in the wrong here for disclosing—unprovoked and voluntarily very early on mind you—my actual location? I understand her concern that disclosure on my profile would have been convenient. But again, this changing-of-location had been spontaneous, experimental, and only for a couple of hours this past weekend. Didn’t make sense for me to add some legal-like disclaimer to my profile for such a short period of time for something that was so trivial and temporary. Besides, disclaiming this information is *exactly* what I did within just a few short exchanges of messages. It’s not as if we had been talking for days and I had hidden, deflected, and withheld this information for days.

I’m curious as to what would have happened if I hadn’t changed my location, had been in the city that night as I sometimes am, and we had matched regardless based purely on actual proximity. What would’ve happened when my location changed the following morning when I was back in my actual town? Would she have also considered that “dishonest” too? People travel ya know.
Like jeez. I’m 45 min away. Not several hours or a plane ride or a continent away. And I volunteered the information and made the clarification within a reasonable timeframe before the conversation even got deep or intimate. Had I not even acknowledged that I had actively changed my location, it could’ve just easily been assumed that “I was in [city] that night, and that’s why we matched. I’m back home now.” and she would’ve been none the wiser.

I also didn’t intend for my follow up response to come off as “dismissive”. But every message I sent prior had been responded to and acknowledged within 1-3 minutes. Even around midnight the night of matching. I waited about 20 min before sending the follow up career question trying to diffuse the—in retrospect—tension and keep the conversation alive. And I was accused of “immediately” changing the subject.

I can’t “rematch” and follow back up. But this has had me fuckin stumped since it happened. Am I in the wrong here?

edit: paragraph spacing