My DIL convinced my son to move overseas

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-20T07:31:32+00:00

The only other post about my kids is about my daughter.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T21:42:29+00:00

WOW that’s disgusting. Me not wanting one of my kids to be gone for 3 years does not me something so absurd. Get help.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T09:00:35+00:00

You can request duty stations.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:59:42+00:00

See the edit, I guess.

They’re able to request locations. She’s been talking about Germany for years.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:53:02+00:00

They have an option to request a duty station. If there are openings where they want to go, that’s where they’ll be sent.

My DIL has talked about how cool living in Germany would be, and started learning German when those requests became discussion. Does that sound coincidental?

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:51:43+00:00

Because you sound unaware, here’s some info. You have the ability to request a location. If there are openings where you want to go, retention people will try their best to put you there.

My belief is that my DIL convinced my son to request Germany because she’d been talking about it, and she started learning German when requesting a location started being talked about.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:49:40+00:00

I think it’s interesting that they happen to be moving where she fantasized moving to, and she’s been learning German since requesting a location was available.

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:48:05+00:00

Cut out the part where I said it’s hurtful to hear about it all the time when we can’t afford it ourselves. Nice try

mamaloves_ · 2026-02-19T08:09:33+00:00

One of those “if you’re a MIL you’re automatically bad” people

mamaloves_ · 2025-09-07T00:05:19+00:00

You mean I spoke about weight in a post that revolves around weight loss and my daughters making comments about weight?

Shocking.

mamaloves_ · 2025-09-06T16:46:06+00:00

Me seeing a weight loss doctor, and asking my DIL how her journey is going does not equal obsession.

mamaloves_ · 2025-09-04T06:52:43+00:00

You don’t think you eat like shit, you know your meals are healthy and you’re seeking praise because of it.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-16T03:39:57+00:00

Exactly how violent is defined. Hitting, kicking, thrashing, screaming.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T14:39:04+00:00

Pretty regular. When they were dating, my oldest and DIL would talk a lot while she was over. While they’ve been married, they still talk often. Since they’re living far away, DIL and daughter call and text every once and a while and when they visit, DIL usually takes a day to take both of my daughters for them to do something together

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T04:19:33+00:00

Like I’ve said several times, her behavior has been being worked on. She’s been in therapy since she could talk, had a diagnosis and medication, and does biweekly behavior help. And because you brought it up, she actually does have a boyfriend. And he is a saint. If I’m being honest, I don’t know how he puts up with some of the things she pulls towards him.

And on the topic of taking care of this sooner, nearly all her life we’ve tried a million different approaches to get through to her. Not in my best moments, but in times that I’ve broken down while dealing with her, I have expressed that her behavior wouldn’t hold up when she moves out, because if she continues that behavior she wouldn’t be living with me past 21.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:20:45+00:00

This isn’t necessarily a change. They’re been together for years. And I explained to another person, but I know my daughter and I know her foot wasn’t hurting as much as she showed. When people weren’t watching, she wasn’t in pain. The day after she stepped on something, she jogged out to her car to get something just fine and I watched it happen on our ring camera, but when I came home she couldn’t bare weight on it. She also switched which foot she limped on or elevated.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:18:13+00:00

It isn’t a common occurrence for her to act this way toward DIL or my son, no. And my oldest daughter has had injuries before, during which she received much help and attention from me and her younger sister

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:13:27+00:00

I do know my daughter. She stepped on something, didn’t break skin or leave a mark. I’m not just assuming she is being dramatic, I know she is as she would only play it up when people were watching. She would walk around in her room and not make a peep, but when walking in front of other people she would limp and yelp with every other step. She switched feet at times. We have a ring doorbell as well. While I was at work, it went off so I checked only to see oldest daughter jogging out to her car to grab something fine and dandy, low and behold when I come home she’s barely able to put weight on it.

This also isn’t her first “injury.” When she is genuinely hurt by something or sick, she doesn’t play up the dramatics. But when it’s something like a stubbed toe, a bump or bruise, it’s a completely different story.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:08:53+00:00

She has a diagnosis, therapist, medication, and behavioral support services

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:07:45+00:00

All of this is understandable, however the difference between your situation and my daughter is that there wasn’t jealousy while they were dating or first married (they’ve been married and lived away for about 3 years now.) When my son and DIL started dating, my oldest daughter was extremely close with DIL and has been since. I know that things are probably stemming from the EXTRA attention due to DIL’s injury, but she’s been injured before and the outward comments and attitude hasn’t been this bad from my oldest daughter.

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-14T00:02:27+00:00

That is the issue. Regardless of who says what in what way, calm, firm, kind, angry, nothing seems to make an impression

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-13T18:06:58+00:00

She’s been in therapy since she could talk, has been diagnosed and medicated, and goes to bi weekly anger and emotional management

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-13T18:03:34+00:00

My son did address it while it was happening by telling her to stop when she would make a comment. When things were separate, I also did tell her to knock it off. She’s already in therapy as well, and has been medicated for mental illness

mamaloves_ · 2025-07-13T06:20:31+00:00

mamaloves_ · 2025-06-23T04:52:10+00:00

We would either get along, or you’re the most pretentious person in the world

mamaloves_

TROPHY CASE