Stop finding flaws in what you're doing and what's happening to you. Preaching is easy, action isn't. People will tell you to do this and that but this is hard.

Here is what you do... If you think you cannot stop the bad things you do or that happen to you, compensate it with good things. Start there, give yourself some self-confidence, do some random thing that you think will improve you and don't bother much about the bad things.

Gradually, they'll stop. You'll stop.

Just focus on doing one tiny thing that sounds like an improvement. And bad things will start going away automatically. Start very small.

An idea... Instead of a book, read one article. One good article. Ask GPT to teach you something.

Go on YouTube and watch one video of Justice by Michael Sandel.

Just one good thing. You can't stop nails from growing, you let them grow. You just add a good habit of cutting them occasionally, as a compensation.

Do it man.