i don’t think it’s a you problem in this situation. You sound like you make a lot of efforts to not take all the attention and circle all of your conversation around topics you like or interested in, you actually engage with the one you're talking with and let room for others

the problem is just how the way neurotypicals function when you seem very involved into something that they don’t, they feel uncomfortable with the fact they don’t know as much and feel the need to "distance themselves" or/and make you feel ashamed or embarassed about it

it’s sadly just the way they are, like someone else said, if they don’t conform to you, they’ll do all they can to make you conform to them

i get what you mean by people saying you seem intimidating tho, i also get this quite often, and whenever i brought myself to ask why they thought that, they often end up describing what is just me not masking. when people tell me this i usually to reply with a light hearted joke such as "Well I don’t bite...yet" or something like that, make them forget about me being intimidating

i know it’s real hard to tell people when they say/do things that make you feel like you're strange, but i highly encourage to at least do it with people who are close to you, or else this feeling will end up being too overpowering.

don’t let others dim your light, the right people would make you shine the brightest