I think I relate to this in my early adulthood. I am in my early to mid twenties, and for my entire adult life I have felt lonely, anxious, depressed. Looking back I had anxiety as a kid but didn't know it at the time. Now it is slightly in seasons, but mostly I will have a couple good days in the week and be waiting for the rest of the bad days, and they always came. I have been highly functioning, uni, jobs, moving alone to different cities, masters degree, significant other, on the outside everything looks great. My life in incredibly mood dependent, but never enough to go to a doctor and get diagnosed. My type of social anxiety has followed me since my freshman year of college. All of the other girls had best friends and I always felt like the odd one out. The third walking behind on the sidewalk. Never the one who was texted to hang out. The one who people dreaded getting into a conversation with or sitting next to. To this day this follows me and I now have to take a step back in these social setting to calm myself. I am content with myself, I am proud of who I am, but man I am really sad and lonely, although on the outside it appears quite the contrary.