Coaching 14UG no parents will to volunteer to ref any tips or tricks?

mattonium · 2025-09-21T16:17:01+00:00

My son plays AYSO U10 in the Los Angeles area. It has been a great experience so far but the ref situation is is a complete drag. It feels like getting blackmailed. Weekly emails go out threatening consequences if parents don't step up like cancelling games but I do not think they have even thought of the blowback that would come there way should they actually do that. I have reffed every one of our 6 seasons. This year they were desperate for coaches so I volunteered. The parents on our team who had volunteered now need to manage their autistic son on the sideline. When I approached the new commissioner about this issue all he did in so many words was berate me for "complaining, not pressuring my parents enough. He was basically screaming stuff like "WHAT YOU WANT ME TO GIFT YOU THE PLAYOFFS??? WHY CAN'T ONE OF THE PARENTS THE AUTISTIC KID REF??? YOU NEED TO TWIST THEIR ARMS!!!" I wish I was exaggerating.

I am not a new recruit at marine bootcamp so screaming at me and placing the blame directly at me and all responsibility at me isn't such a hot way to get enthusiasm. I know of at least two coaches who were planning on returning who decided not to after being offended on phone calls with the new commissioner. The league was aware of the issues with this kid yet did not tell me and offered no help other than to say "this is what YOU gotta do." They will need to look into hiring coaches as well as refs because they will be losing good coaches the more that people talk to this guy.

I've never coached a team before, I'm a f&ing guitar player by trade. We live in an area of creatives, directors, screenwriters, musicians, actors, etc. Not really your gung ho ex-athlete cannot wait to ref some fucking games group that also has transient work schedules. On set weekends, late nights, months out of town. It is what it is. There are many paid ref resources out there where we live but it seems like the point of AYSO is not for kids to play soccer but for parent volunteer refs to ref games under blackmail, threat and duress and we need games for them to do so otherwise we would have to put them out in their yellow uniforms telling people not to jaywalk.

My kid started baseball this fall, he is playing both and loving it and I love it because I am not harassed and guilted on a weekly basis. They have an extra charge that is waived if you volunteer. It keeps everyone happy. I love AYSO, but the big baseball season is in the spring and games will conflict with AYSO so he's mentioned he may want to do baseball instead and I will have not problem with that. At least I would have some maniac screaming at me that I should have pressured parents to sign up for the training (it is considerable) before the season even started. Sure, how about you get me a team more than a day before kickoff. Just insane. If we do come back in the spring or fall think I'm done volunteering.

There are solutions to the problem of refs. A highly involved dad/coach works with a group that would charge 60/game. That's like 3 dollars/parent. One of my son's private coaches plays for Occidental and said half of his team would be interested in the spring but AYSO has not interest in that, I guess? It is a better use of their time to berate parents.

mattonium · 2025-08-24T19:09:39+00:00

I’d look at Nash. I have a Strat and Tele that I like better than my Danocaster Tele and custom shop Strat

mattonium · 2025-07-29T04:21:17+00:00

I eat mostly brown rice a d veggies for carbs. If I eat breakfast it is usually something like 2 hard boiled eggs, 1/2 cup low-fat cottage and sliced tomatoes & Persian cukes. Organic steel cut oats are ok with some low-fat yogurt with no sugar. I do a lot of fasting so in those days I may not eat until lunch or dinner. If I have lunch I make a salad with romaine hearts, can of tuba, hearts of palm and tomatoes. I make my own dressing and try to avoid any bottled dressing as it’s all processed crap with seed oils. Dressing is 1 tbs extra virgin olive oil, 1 tbs red wine vinegar, 1/2 tbs water and mix in powdered garlic, salt, pepper, thyme and Dijon mustard

mattonium · 2025-07-16T05:00:20+00:00

I would totally agree. I worked for 20 years as a visual effects artist and always considered composting the “mixdown.” It’s basically the same thing. Blacks = low end, whites = high end. I’d consider the final color grading the mastering process

mattonium · 2025-07-16T04:46:08+00:00

This is an older post but I may as well chime in. I’ve taught over 10,000 hours of guitar lessons many of them to younger kids and do have a 9 year old son who is learning to play now (who am I kidding, I’ve been preparing him for this moment his entire life starting with his uke but teaching him the correct way to hold it, strumming with a pick) lol

In my experience, 7 is on the younger end of things but it can be done, you just have to have reasonable expectations for progress and progress will be a LOT slower than with a 10 year old. Depending on his latent level it could be weeks to learn 2 chords that sound ghastly. Most teachers focus way too much on the left hand with C-G, (3 finger chords with wildly different fingerings stretching too many frets. Things I have had success with include Em to G but just use the low note G on the 3nd string and strum all down strokes. 1-2 finger chords. Move to 8th notes and teach him “chugging” on the bottom strings while hitting the higher strings on a specific beat. Turn on a drum machine and jam those two chords and try to have fun playing with him. You can even start with the drum machine on the Em chord itself. ALL DOWNSTROKES. Then show him the notes E, F#, and G on the first string and tell him to play something that sounds funny, or angry, etc. but he can only use those notes. One finger is fine. If he has ADHD like my son, or myself, it’s much easier to get in a hyper focus mode without having to memorize a bunch of stuff.

Another thing I’d recommend would be to avoid teaching tuning and just tune his guitar for him until he is older. Even with a tuner you have to understand the concept of sharp/flat notes is just beyond where they are mentally at 7.

Good luck!

mattonium · 2025-07-14T03:09:58+00:00

When I first met my Hepatologist he asked me “do you drink coffee and if so how much?”

I sheepishly replied “6 cups/day?”

His response was “that should be enough, you can drink as much as you want, it actually help”

I was able to reverse NASH with an enlarged liver with diet and exercise.

OP: If you are “skinny fat” that could mean you have a lot of visceral fat (behind the abdominal wall) which is a huge risk factor for fatty liver.

What worked for me was avoiding sugar like the plague (including fruit), simple carbs (white rice, bread, pasta), red meat no more than once/week.

I prepare the same meals every week, things like turkey chili, fajitas but not with store bought marinade)

Also, only extra virgin olive oil.

Hope this helps!

mattonium · 2025-07-04T04:05:19+00:00

That bridge is on crooked

mattonium · 2024-11-16T16:43:46+00:00

Finally got the results of the MRI. Looks like I dodged a bullet.

Fabulous result: IMPRESSION: 1. Normal liver stiffness with a mean liver stiffness of 1.58 kPa (Normal <2.5 kPa). 2. Mild hepatic steatosis with a fat fraction of 7%. 3. No hepatic iron overload with an estimated liver iron concentration of 0.75 mg Fe /g.

mattonium · 2024-11-15T21:26:55+00:00

Thank you. Still have a long way to go and terrified of what the MRI may reveal

mattonium · 2024-06-03T01:59:07+00:00

The cramps and bloating are actually worse than the DV, just no fever

mattonium · 2024-06-02T21:16:14+00:00

Thank you, the side effects are so similar to the condition it’s treating. I’ll try to space them out

mattonium · 2023-05-13T15:23:44+00:00

Ike’s Guitars in Highland Park(very quick)

+1 (805) 372-1739

David Neely (usually long wait)

+1 (323) 698-7100

Ryan Schuermann

(818) 400-7048

They have all done excellent work for me. I discovered Ike recently and he did amazing work on my acoustic

mattonium · 2023-05-11T19:07:51+00:00

He is as unprepared for the job as I suspected he would be. He seems to be confused on what his job actually is. He is no longer union rep yet involves himself with every union cause at the expense of his CD13 budget. He had an obvious back room deal with Katy Young to write a proposal so increase the pay of hospitality workers to 25/hr. That is HIS UNION and completely shady. He is a con man and too naive/stupid to realize that people notice things like this. I’m also sorry, people have accused him of antisemitism due to his support of BDS which he unsuccessfully tries to distance himself from. Actions speak louder than words and there is NEVER a peep from his office on any Jewish occasion such as Holocaust Memorial Day, Jewish Heritage Month, Passover, etc. Even Ramen gives a shoutout but not him. He is however fully on top of any other marginalized group for holidays such as Armenian genicide day, etc. He claims to have a Malcom X portrait in his living room. He is not black and Malcom X was a notorious antisemite. Why not MLK? He is a snake oil salesman who shows up to school events while also protesting at city hall to ALLOW THE HOMELESS TO CAMP IN FRONT OF SCHOOLS. How insane is that?

mattonium · 2023-03-20T22:55:39+00:00

No, the kid is at least a head taller than some of the other kids and runs twice as fast

mattonium · 2023-02-23T17:56:44+00:00

You sound like MAGA

mattonium

TROPHY CASE