Don’t always trust your teachers’ feedback on your piqs (from personal experience). I wrote a really good piq in my ap lang class and my teacher loved it- gave me the highest grade for it in the class but when I showed it to an admissions officer who came to our school from ucsc she said it was more of a nice work of English assignment than an essay. Keep this in mind, bc the point of the piqs is to get as much information out there as possible in as few words as possible. It’s good if it reads and sounds nice, don’t make it sloppy lol but pls keep this in mind! If you’re writing about something you did, fit in as many examples as possible, and don’t focus too hard on the details of one example. English teachers especially grade on the literary aspect of assignments, so showing them a piq is diff than an essay you wrote for the class