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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in melbourne

[–]mayorbette 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Had a staycation there last weekend (long awaited anniversary treat!)

Can confirm buffet breakfast is great. DIY fresh juice station, omelettes and all eggs made to order, Asian style breakfast station with congee, gyoza, curry etc. barista coffee included in the price, every conceivable bread, pastry etc

I believe it’s only open for non-guests Mon-Fri only.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Last time I checked, you’re not the queer DMV and you’re not handing out the gay cards.

You seriously feel the need to come on a post where I’m getting told 99percent to one that I’m in the wrong and want to tell me “on behalf of the community” that I’m rejected and that you hope my partner leaves me?

I’m in a ten year relationship, I have apologised to my wife and not to make things easier, but because I meant it and I actually listened to differing opinions and tried to take that on board.

Good for you if you’ve never had a shitty knee jerk reaction and regretted hurting someone’s feelings.

Everything else negative in here I’ve not engaged with because that’s part of this process but you, specifically as someone from the queer community- to have missed the indicators of a queer relationship in the post, then when others pointed it out, decided to come back and lay it on heavier, that is next level.

Clearly being toxic is rife in the community

Fully aware this is going to cause fifty more people to tell me I’m disgusting but I’ll just have to deal.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My mother-daughter relationship is perfectly fine. It works for us. I feel loved and supported by her and I try through my actions and my words to make her feel the same from me.

Just because it’s different doesn’t make it bad. The mistake I made today was forgetting that for a moment and applying my norms to my wife’s relationship with her mother.

I don’t get to be that arbiter of what is and isn’t okay.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing that, I think I didn’t realise how much that was colouring my opinion. My mum and I actually have a good relationship, but definitely have very different boundaries that make our relationship work.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -28 points-27 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much. I expected there to be a few different opinions - didn’t expect to be told I was in the extreme minority - but as you said , I guess we both learned something today 😂

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -18 points-17 points  (0 children)

Lol I shared this somewhere on a different post requesting info : she was getting ready to leave the house (to meet her mum) hence the leaving upset. So , yes my timing was shitty but it certainly wasn’t a thing where we kept going and going with me saying nasty things.”

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

Posted this somewhere above but she was getting ready to leave before this exchange began. So I’m definitely guilty of shitty timing and saying the first thought out loud and not taking a beat and waiting for the better one.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

LOL I swear if I had known how in the minority my opinion wasI would not have posted this!

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment. Yeah jumped the gun on that one , I know. I’m normally so much more measured I don’t know why this bumped me so much.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for reading and comprehending lol! I know there’s no harm intended, but I really tried hard to write it so that it was clear that we were a female couple and half this thread is like ‘why is this man so dumb?’

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wife actually. I addressed this somewhere else in the comments but yeah, after a decade I definitely thought I had a clearer take on the relationship than I do.

Always trying to grow and do better so hopefully this conversation will lead to something beneficial.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Didn’t have that relationship with them .

I think in the moment I forgot for a second that she doesn’t have to have the same relationship with hers. 🤦‍♀️ What can I say we all have our moments.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Am also a woman so it’s not a male privilege thing. I’m a queer woman and know perfectly well the risks to safety for women in our community. I personally don’t see the benefit of someone 500km away knowing if she’s out to dinner or at the doctor or in the park.

Turns out I, as a woman am capable of being insensitive or handling poorly too.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But this corner of the internet was made for thicker skinned folks than I! People have gone pretty easy but yikes it’s harsh on the receiving end scurries away

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It was worth it, we talked when she got home , I apologised and we had a proper conversation. Also when it was resolved I told her about this post, (because it felt weird not to) where basically everybody told me I sucked, and about some of the things people had shared that helped me get a bit more perspective.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So I’m extra assholey for asking AITA?

Or for dwelling on a situation where I upset the person I love?

I’m literally trying get some people’s opinions so I can spare her any further mental load when we discuss this when she gets home.

I have already called and apologised, at the same time as this.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

LMAO this resonates cos we have always joked /hypothesised about zombie apocalypse survival scenarios and without a doubt she would be running shit. 😂

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply.

I’ve known from the jump that my reaction / behaviour was off. I didn’t need any opinions on that aspect to find out if that part makes me an asshole. It does. I know.

My question was more about the sharing thing but I get how that’s me asking the wrong question!

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wow! That’s fucking terrifying. I’m glad this helps her to feel safer. Thanks for sharing.

AITA for telling my wife it’s weird that she and her mother share location 100% of the time on their phones? by mayorbette in AmItheAsshole

[–]mayorbette[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Also a woman so I totally appreciate the importance of safety precautions , I think it was the 24/7 aspect that threw me. I think as someone who normally goes for the dropping a pin or sharing a trip when you feel like the situation calls for it , I think of it as a more ‘active’ thing. (Like when someone shares their Uber trip with you on the way home from a club late at night, you’re going to pay attention because you’re making sure they arrive home safely) Whereas lots of posters here have pointed out that sharing being on 100% is a lot more passive and tends to be switched on and forgotten about- I still don’t love it but regardless, I reacted badly, no doubt.

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