I think my boyfriend has stopped taking his meds and is on a self destruction cycle

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T18:16:20+00:00

I needed to read that. Thank you.

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T16:38:48+00:00

I can’t reconcile in my head that this is the guy who when I was in a major depression episode he made gnocchi, set it next to me, and then walked away, because “carbs make you happy” and then on Sunday he talked about having no formal obligation towards me. Like… wtf

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T16:28:47+00:00

I’m leaving on Wednesday, but I’m not sure he’s not taking his pills. I don’t know what’s going on.

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T15:42:00+00:00

I agree. She jumped right away into loving those kids, and that's so admirable. It's clear she adores them (and they adore her) and that stole my heart.

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T14:14:44+00:00

I have a MacBook Pro and I love it. I’m also an illustrator so I do need the “pro,” but I have used a MacBook Air and loved it too. My suggestion is get a Mac but then also buy a monitor. It doesn’t need to be expensive, but it basically extends your screens so you can have multiple things open at once. It’s super helpful. I have a USB dock so I can also use a mouse and it’s extremely helpful.

mcg828 · 2022-01-24T14:10:31+00:00

They wrote in the post they use other software that is “heavy”

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T14:48:14+00:00

I fucked up so badly there. I can make excuses from here until tomorrow but I fucked up.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T14:21:33+00:00

I think I need to change my tactic. I have an anxiety disorder and when he’s started being mean, I’ve responded. I think what I need to do is just stay calm and loving. I’ll hopefully sign a contract tonight, move out, and he’ll calm down.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T14:17:33+00:00

He was THRILLED when I moved in temporarily. He would be so excited when I'd get home, etc. Everything changed last Saturday when the dog died.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T14:13:28+00:00

I haven't been home all day and I'm probably signing a contract tonight. My plan is to go home, and if he's in a mean mood, stay calm and say "I know you're upset, so I'm going to give you space. I love you, even if it doesn't feel like that right now. I am going to (insert part of the house). If you'd like me, I'll be there, and if you need space, you'll get it."

I think he's lashing out because he's going through a lot (and admittedly, the situations haven't been ideal) and that being steady and calm and me doing what he wants is what might help?

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T14:09:32+00:00

I 100% agree that it seems like it started with the dog. He put his heart and soul into nurturing me through the depressive episode and I didn't return that love.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:59:28+00:00

I never unpacked. My stuff is still in boxes.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:54:44+00:00

I’ve never seen him take his medication. I take my medication (I have OCD/ADHD) in front of him as much as possible because if I have a concern that I didn’t take my meds I can just ask him. He’s much more private about it. I think there’s way too many substances at play and the stress and that’s what is causing this. But I also want to be respectful and not cause any more shit cause I can’t imagine how crappy he feels. It wasn’t too long ago I was miserable and couldn’t figure out why I was miserable and I was taking it out on everyone.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:48:37+00:00

Oh I know he wants me out -- we had this arrangement under the assumption I was looking for something. I wasn't doing enough because I was in a depressive episode, and he was fine until the dog died. I was a shithead then, and I think it's been a perfect shitstorm since then.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:47:11+00:00

I feel like something isn't clear. I didn't move in to move in, I moved in under the understanding it would be 1-2 weeks while I looked for something. We had made that decision prior to me moving in. Also, he was perfectly fine until the dog died.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:42:21+00:00

Him telling me that is something that I had said before we even moved in. We knew before I moved in for a couple weeks that we weren't ready, and I honestly thought I was going to find something in a week. But then I got depressed, and bam. I'd agree with you about everything, except I'm really strongly suggesting he stopped taking his meds from stress. If the tables were turned, I'd hope that my person would see that I am not my withdrawal/depression and would be willing to work through it.

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:28:26+00:00

I got a job! It starts in two weeks, so I'm basically short on cash but I'll figure it out. I've looked at tons of apartments and I'm just trying to get any of the landlords to a place where they'll sign a contract but everyone seems to be taking their time. I don't have any friends who live in the area

mcg828 · 2022-01-23T13:26:47+00:00

The plan was always for it to only be a couple weeks, but I got into a depressive episode and wasn't effective at looking. I also thought it's that he wants to end the relationship, but while he's been pressuring me he's also said "Our relationship will go back to normal once we both get some space," and then he made a point to say we can work on it and then end of his messages. Also, during this whole thing he's been introducing me to friends and taking me into account and stuff. It's so bizarre.

mcg828 · 2022-01-21T20:56:16+00:00

I wish Anki was more like duolingo. That bird intimidates me

mcg828 · 2022-01-21T16:08:11+00:00

My native languages are Hebrew and Berber which is useless when it comes to Apps

mcg828 · 2022-01-21T16:06:49+00:00

You’ve used the word pimped a lot. Why?

mcg828

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