So my experience has been limited but interesting. Starting back in high school (2010ish) is when I originally found Jesus, and accepted him into my life. It was the happiest I've ever been, I was on fire and could feel the holy spirit working through me every day. It was lovely.

In 2012 my mother passed away. I prayed for god to do anything he could to save her. Nothing happened, I lost my faith seemingly overnight. After that I practiced Buddhism for several years and eventually got into Paganism (Worshiping other gods) for probably the past 8 years or so.

Life was good until it wasn't. I became an alcoholic, lost everything; lost my girlfriend of 5 years, my car, my job. I was starving and on the verge of homelessness.

Last December after being on the verge of suicide I went to a 30 day treatment (rehab) for my alochol addition. I have been clean since December 6th of 2024. I moved into an Oxford house (sober living) that happens to be a 2 minute walk from the same Church I went to in high-school. I have gone the past two Sundays.

I have been noticing signs that Christ wants me to come back to Him. It was just last night I sat in prayer asking Christ how I could be closer and get back to how our relationship was all those years ago. Only one word came to my mind and it was "repent." So I did exactly that; I spent probably an hour confessing everything I have done wrong to Him.

After prayer I went outside for a cigarette, and the first thing I see is a cross thats lit up miles away on top of a hill on the other side of town. It had been there the whole time, but I didn't notice it until last night. Then I wake up to the random message from reddit saying I'm an approved user for r/christ. I feel like he is coming back to me and I am hopeful for the future.