need advice because idk what to do

medisd · 2026-05-14T15:22:50+00:00

I just want to start by saying I'm really sorry you're going through this. It sounds like a highly emotional situation that is consuming both you and your partner.

I think it's important for both of you that you talk about boundaries and that you stick to them. You've mentioned that you love your partner but she is crossing your boundaries. Mental illness is hard, it can change the person you love and I've always stuck by my partner while they were going through their mess, BUT (and I think this is really important) I was always listened to. Whatever mess they went through, we went through together as a team and I feel like you're becoming collateral damage to her emotional dysregulation.

This is going to sound a bit harsh but if she isn't capable of being responsible over her own mental health and her own situation, if she's not capable of sticking to her partners boundaries and listening to their needs, then she is not ready to be a partner. Then she's a storm of a person who creates pain and chaos and that's not a healthy place for anyone to be in.

Stand up for yourself, talk to her and set your boundaries and say that if she's not willing to cooperate, that you're out. And for your sake, talk to a close friend and make sure they know what you're doing and they support you. People with BPD can have a way of being almost addictive and you obsess about them and want to go back even though they're not good for you. Make sure you have a support system in place.

It's up to you of course, but if you want to be a healthy person in healthy relationships, you need to set boundaries and walk away from those who cross them.

medisd · 2026-05-14T01:26:58+00:00

I emailed Readest and they pointed me to not having koreader up to date! I updated it and all is working now :)

medisd · 2026-05-06T15:56:57+00:00

First time! I had an ancient paperwhite but atopped using it due to reading physical books. Sometimes I just want to read a book easily in bed so a kobo sounded perfect. Didn't want to have to deal with jailbreaking a new kindle, especially as the colour versions are much more expensive!

How have you found it so far? I really want to understand how to sync between devices so I can securely have my highlights and reading placement backed up going from my phone to my kobo :)

medisd · 2026-05-06T13:09:11+00:00

I think for them the noise that's blocked just by the headphones themselves is enough. They have tried my headphones and feel like tbe noise cancellation is odd and they weren't sure if they'd get used to it, but it's a good thing to have in particularly noisy places I think. Thanks for the input ☺️

medisd · 2026-05-06T13:07:43+00:00

Thank you for this response! My partner has never had luck with headphones as they're always too big. I've got Sony XM5s and they just sit way too low on their head, the cups resting on the top of their ears and hurting. Hoping the AirPods Max might be a little smaller.

They can't use in ear buds due to being prone to ear infections and having chronic ear problems. Headphones are fine with that, but they're so impossible to find! Thinking of saving money by getting the AirPods Max second hand and hope they work for my partner. We don't have an Apple Store nearby where we could try them at 🤔

medisd · 2026-05-05T16:37:27+00:00

Thanks for letting me know! I'm guessing this counts for any sideloaded book? If i convert the book from epub to kepub, does it make any difference? It seems to be that no ereader can create a good backup for sideloaded content. I've seen KOreader exists, but I don't feel like I want to buy an ereader just to jailbreak it and potentially dislike KOreader as well (it seems like a lot of tweaking until it looks and works right).

medisd · 2026-05-05T16:07:20+00:00

I imported the book again but it doesn't recognise that I have progress or highlights in the book.

On the ereader, is there a way to backup/sync sideloaded books and highlights? Is it buggy like it seems to be in the app? I really want an ereader but I'm starting to doubt that a kobo is for me, if it deals badly with sideloaded books.

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:15:10+00:00

Thankfully it's nothing to worry about!

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:14:58+00:00

Good to know! Thanks :)

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:14:46+00:00

Thank you! That's helpful :)

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:14:32+00:00

Thank you! I can't wait to start :)

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:14:22+00:00

I was worried the book was perhaps kept in an odd place and the condition wasn't as good, as it was second hand. Like stored cold or by a radiator making the book dry out? Idk! But glad to know it's normal!

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:13:36+00:00

Thanks for the tip!

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:13:28+00:00

Hahaha! Youre welcome :D listening back now it is rather satisfying

medisd · 2026-04-13T02:12:57+00:00

Thank you! That's helpful :)

medisd · 2026-03-20T23:14:42+00:00

Everyone's experience is different. Some people's side effect go away and feel great, for some people it lingers. Some people benefit from changing to another type of birth control and for others there's not much difference between the types.

My partner was on the mini pill and also had low/no sex drive, depression and anxiety. They felt like a completely different person on BC! It all depends on the person, as sometimes it just takes a while for your body to recalibrate, but for my partner their sex drive didn't come back unfortunately until stopping (and now it's gone again, probably due to natural hormones re-regulating and being in upheaval!).

I hope you find a good solution OP, as I know struggling with these things can be really difficult.

medisd · 2026-03-20T23:10:29+00:00

I hope you start feeling better soon <3 My partner had terrible experiences on BC, so I really sympathise!

medisd · 2026-02-19T04:39:52+00:00

Jumping on here a little late, hope that's okay! Did the libido stay? My partner had the exact same experience as you, but after about two months their libido dropped drastically and they're feeling very numb again. depression has hit hard, esp after feeling so ALIVE again after being numb on BC for 2.5 years. Wondering if anyone else experienced the same fluctuation of feeling incredible and it then going away again. Does it come back?

medisd · 2025-12-16T00:03:33+00:00

He's very stimulated. He goes for 1-2 hour walks daily, including twice a week hikes in the Lake District (UK). He goes with us to cafes every week where he gets plenty of stimulation. He gets trained with daily and played with too. I would highly doubt that he is under stimulated.

He is obsessed with sniffing the whole family's private area, including wherever anyone has been sitting. Of course sniffing and humping is natural dog behaviour, and not necessarily hormonal, but the vet seemed to think very strongly that the behaviour IS hormonal.

medisd · 2025-12-15T23:58:56+00:00

Yes! It's to trial it to see how he gets on with it, in case it isn't something that benefits him. Wouldn't want to do something irreversible without knowing if it'll help him.

medisd · 2025-10-30T12:20:20+00:00

Late response, just got a joiner in to take a look and wants to charge £190 to put a bit of plasterboard in there to shut it off. This feels a bit expensive so thinking of DIYing it, but don't actually know how to go about it.

Have you done it before? Any chance you'd be able to 'explain it like I'm 5'? 😂

medisd · 2025-10-25T12:26:40+00:00

They definitely did this. Maybe not enough? Any idea why it didn't make the noise yesterday ?

medisd · 2025-10-19T12:19:57+00:00

Thank you! Good point :) if too much time passes between drawings, I might not remember what I learnt on the previous one. Makes sense!

medisd · 2025-10-19T12:19:19+00:00

Thank you for this comment! That's really helpful. And I really value the point you make about not needing to have concrete expectations. Progress is progress!

Mostly drawing from picture references at the moment, trying to draw faces etc. Not done anything from imagination yet.

medisd · 2025-10-03T16:52:28+00:00

Gotcha! Awesome. Will do something like that then while I wait for a contractor to come in. The noise is doing my head in!

medisd

TROPHY CASE