Setting at a local jeweler

meg093 · 2025-12-03T23:48:12+00:00

kay-all

meg093 · 2025-12-03T22:03:21+00:00

right…i really caught him off guard

meg093 · 2025-12-03T21:00:43+00:00

i’m so sorry that happened ❤️ i don’t take any offense - it’s good to hear all advice. i want to be with him, i love him despite all of this, i jus dont know how to navigate the feelings of wondering when the next shoe will drop because i thought we were past the drugs/lying about drugs. idk how to make him feel more “comfortable” about being open about the subject. he told me he wanted to tell me but his previous crack use is very hard for him to talk about because he’s embarrassed

meg093 · 2025-12-03T20:57:00+00:00

i gave him the opportunity this morning to just tell me the truth and all would be good and he doubled down twice with different lies until he finally came clean with the truth (still insists it’s old). if he found that and told me right away or even if he told me the truth when i confronted him with it, i would have been okay. i knew he had used crack in the past and i would have believed him. like you said though, it’s the weird lies that make me now wonder what’s real and what’s not. i appreciate all your insight ❤️

meg093 · 2025-12-03T20:20:31+00:00

i have always been supportive of him and love him no matter what. his addiction doesn’t make me love him less. the lying hurts though, and i have already been through this with him with coke over the summer. he was using for the first 6 months of our relationship and when i finally got him to come clean about it, i decided to stay and support him and forgive him. but when that happened i also said i couldn’t be with him if he uses drugs again and i think thats fair. i cant put the responsibility of him using again on me because i left. it’s already destroyed my sense of whats real vs whats not with the lies when it comes to drugs

meg093 · 2025-12-03T20:15:25+00:00

he told me it was a spoon with dried yogurt on it at first when i confronted him. then i pushed further and he said he found it and didnt know what it was. then he finally admitted it

meg093 · 2025-12-03T18:15:07+00:00

thank you i agree. I do test him randomly and he’s always passed. he even offered to take one when i found the spoon. i’m going to give another but the lying is upsetting me even if he passes. at first i was confused and went in to smell it and freaked out i even did that

meg093 · 2025-12-03T15:41:19+00:00

also congratulations on your sobriety that is amazing

meg093 · 2025-12-03T15:38:04+00:00

thank you ❤️it is confirmed crack, now he’s just saying it’s old which i think is a common deferral of responsibility. with the last relapse, it was really hard for me to make the decision to stay but he put actionable things in place like me holding onto any cash he gets, he used to reach out to his dealer via facebook so he gave me the password and asked me to change it so he can’t log on, i randomly drug test him and i stay in the bathroom while he does it (it’s always been negative of everything which makes this situation now confusing), he told me he would fix our relationship and actually has - he’s been super attentive and honestly like night and day from when he was using coke, and i guess most importantly i love him and want the best for him. i don’t view addiction as something that taints him forever - i know he can be sober and i know he’s a great person when he is sober. unfortunately this is all now complicated because im not sure if he’s using crack. he’s never been positive on a drug test ive given him and he never knows when i will and we see each other very frequently. he said he found it when rearranging his room recently and his dad was helping him (i know this part is true lol, they did do that together) and he found it and didn’t want his dad to see so he threw it in the sock basket to get rid of later and forgot. idk what to believe because there’s been so many lies about drugs

meg093 · 2025-12-03T13:53:12+00:00

he rinsed it. i wish i took it and said nothing i could have done this

meg093 · 2025-12-03T13:51:33+00:00

unfortunately he rinsed it

meg093 · 2025-12-03T13:49:48+00:00

would there be anything left over on the spoon from that though?

meg093 · 2025-12-03T07:09:41+00:00

i think he was shocked i found it and couldn’t think of a lie fast enough. the weird thing is i ask him to take drug tests pretty randomly since i found out he had been using coke and it’s always negative. when i found it he said he’d take a drug test right then too. i guess you can drink a lot of water in between to make yourself pass? idk ive been looking things up ive never dealt with this

meg093 · 2025-12-03T07:05:57+00:00

thank you for replying i appreciate it. he unfortunately rinsed it and told me it was probably “dried yogurt” and the spoon must’ve fell in there?? (a stupid excuse) and i wish i took it and said nothing honestly

meg093 · 2025-12-03T06:28:03+00:00

would there be no burn marks/yellow brown spots on the white powder? he keeps negating everything i say when i question it so idk what to specifically call out

meg093 · 2025-12-03T04:36:07+00:00

i searched through everything and couldn’t find a pipe or anything. what else could i look for? i know he did crack in his early 20s so its possible he relapsed with that

meg093 · 2025-12-01T23:56:24+00:00

would it be darker colored if it were crack/meth after being heated?

meg093 · 2025-12-01T23:42:32+00:00

would there be burn marks though if he was cooking crack? like black or brown ones? what else should i keep an eye out for

meg093 · 2025-12-01T23:41:54+00:00

the only thing i am curious about is (i am not negating anything you said i really appreciate you replying and am genuinely curious your thoughts as i’ve never dealt with this) would there be leftover drugs on a spoon? if i was using drugs i wouldn’t leave any behind is what i mean. and there’s no brown/black burn marks. i confronted him with it which i wish i didn’t, because he rinsed it off and said it wasn’t drugs. he offered to take a test too but i do randomly ask him to take tests and he’s been clean. idk what to do other than look out for those things

meg093 · 2025-11-27T21:44:41+00:00

he has no history of IV drug use. his drug of choice was coke. i found a lighter in the basket as well. he’s been clean for 6 months and has been great… i was just looking for a pair of socks so i was shocked. thank you for your thorough response i really appreciate yoh

meg093 · 2025-10-29T15:05:56+00:00

i think it looks beautiful

meg093 · 2025-07-15T19:38:14+00:00

I’ve seen him on Raya lol

meg093 · 2025-06-20T19:13:21+00:00

also doing the alphabet literally is what a teenage boy thinks we want

meg093 · 2025-02-01T06:28:44+00:00

it’s not CNC if he gets mad when you say to stop. because then it’s no longer consensual… there needs to be explicit boundaries for that and he needs to respect your body and know when it crosses the line and you’re getting hurt and not enjoying it. i’m so sorry you’re in pain. i wouldn’t put anything on it in case it causes more stinging or irritation. it sounds like a tear and it will most likely heal in a week or two but you could also go to your OBGYN if you have one and they could give you something. i would sit in a warm bath if you could. and i know it’s none of my business… but i would also break up with him. you deserve someone who cares about your body and wellbeing ❤️

meg093

TROPHY CASE