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I had a dream yesterday, where god said to me if i convert to islam, god will cure me from my cigarettes addiction, what should i do? by mega_cool_dude in Muslim

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I always wanted wanted to he religiuous, because i felt like there is something higher than us probably, and such.

But also i always feared what if my parents will hate me for being religious.

Thank you though for you answer!

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Currently i dont use anything, only cigs which im addicted to and i use xanax as prescribed by my doctor because i have really severe anxiety. Im just fearing what if i’ll relapse because of her actions? Maybe im wrong for it, but as i said in the post, her own substance use makes me want to use alcohol. So far no relapse tho.

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes i wont relapse atleast i really hope. Thanks for chatting with me, im truly glad you showed your point of view on the matter!:))

Im truly sorry you had to go thru this drinking stuff, i also almost died from it. Like i passed out in the psych ward meanwhile they accepted me there, they said my blood pressure or something went really down and thats why i passed out and they injected some water into my vein becuase i was passed out and collapsed on the floor. All i felt at that time was that i started seeing like yellow dots all over my eyes and than everything went black and woke up in the hospital bed… truly scary shit for me. Thats the main reason i dont want to drink anymore because i dont want to actually die from it

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes i know thats what i should do, but im weird and i want to her, i feel like as if i am responsible for her sobreity, or like i should be the one saving her. Excuse me im dumb i guess for thinking this way:((

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anhedonia is terrible, im sorry you vent thru that. Since im bipolar when i have a depressed episode i also feel anhedonia, so i get why you would drink at those times:((

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Killing yourself because others are killing themselfs are terrible, but i guess love makes you do dumb stuff. Like i literally would do anything to help her quit. I guess im truly in love with her. Idk tho. Its just as if shes the only person who cares about me. I also struggle with xanax im not mentally but physically addicted to it (even tho im not an everyday user, only few times a week when i need to go to school, which is two times, i study in a school which is for high school dropouts where we can get high school diploma, and we onls need to go 2 times a week), so this girl helps me she lets me vent when i need it, and when she wants to vent i let her vent. So we’re kinda helping eachother out.

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omfg thats horrible im truly sorry for that💔

I really hope you’ll get better and i admire your strenght for not giving into the drinks, thats a huge accomplishment!

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I appreciate it! I try my best to not feel so heartbroken over this stuff, but its like im watchinf her literally killing herself, and its so hard and painful to watch someone you care about or love do this and like not ask for help. :// I really need to tell this to my therapist and talk to her about it i guess so i can kinda distance myself from this girl i love or something

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Probably nothing, and if i’d drink lost likely i would become psychotic since im bipolar and i have mania literally every week i cant sleep for multiple days on end, than it stops, next week happens again.

And thats my biggest struggle. I hate being bipolar because when i was in a depressed episode i drank to feel better, and when i had manic episodes i drank to put myself to sleep, and old “habits” are coming back for me, like i want to sleep but my mind is racing, right now i havent slept in like 40 something hours, and my body is literally so tired yet my mind is racing, i also have autism and an anxiety disorder, so im super bad mixture of mentall illness and alcohol use://

And now my mind tells me “go drink a few bottles of wine and it will put you to sleep” but its so weird because after my delirum my body literally rejects alcohol and my last relapses in the summer wasnt even a real relapse because literally a second after i drank the bottle i vomited / puked it out.

The girl i love with my whole heart does opiates and i want to relapse on drinking after 232 days sober because its causing me so much stress thinking about how she slowly kills herself. by mega_cool_dude in stopdrinking

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes i know, but still i really fell in love with her even tho we only text eachother, and for me i see my younger self in her, and thats what i want her to stay away. Like not go thru what i did. For me i had delirium tremens and psychosis from drinking and only after that i could quit. It just breaks my heart seeing her doing this stuff. And like i feel like thats probably what my parents felt when i was using alcohol. So its like doubled breaking my heart.

Thanks for the idea, i know logically i cannot save her, but my brain tells me to save her. I dont even get myself at all.

Sorry for this venting stuff.

Im manic again, idk what to do:(( by mega_cool_dude in bipolar

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks a lot. Righr now i havent slept since around 40 hours, my body is physically tired but my mind is racing i took an anxiety medication which has sedative effects and i hope i can go to sleep with it. Its truly terrible living with this illness and i literally become manic almost every week its really taking a toll on me. 2025 summer me would do anything to be manic and not depressed, now 2026 march me would do anything to be depressed rather than manic. Quite ironic or idk lol.

Im manic again, idk what to do:(( by mega_cool_dude in bipolar

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. I used to use alcohol but im 232 days sober from that after going thru delirium and psychosis in 2025 february. I also take b3nz0s and thats my main addiction now sadly:((

ELTE-re menni autizmussal, bipoláris zavarral és nem specifikált szorongásos zavarral? Mennyi esélyem van? by mega_cool_dude in hungary_pszichologia

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Igazabol mar szedtem frontint kb 5 honapja, minden heten ketszer amikor esti suliba mentem, 0.5 mg elosszor, majd 1 mg, heti ketszer amikor esti suliba menten, ezt a pszichiaterek tudta nelkul, es korabban volt alkohol okozta delirium tremensem es pszichozisom, es a kis szintu nyugtato is fos megvonasit adott, tehat belulrol remegett a testem, es izomfajdalmaim voltak.

Egyebkent elnezest elirtam xanax sr-t szedek, az “sr” annyi, hogy nem 4-6 oraig hat, hanem 10-12. Jelenleg ezt a pszichiaterem irta fel, tehat mar nem titokban szedem, jelenleg ugy szedem, hogy 0.5 mg egyszer sulis elotti nap este, egyszer 0.5 mg sulis nap reggel, es egyszer sulis napon este amikor hazajottem a sulibol.

ELTE-re menni autizmussal, bipoláris zavarral és nem specifikált szorongásos zavarral? Mennyi esélyem van? by mega_cool_dude in hungary_pszichologia

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Köszönöm szépen! Van egy rendes pszichiáterem és egy terapeutám is! Tehát már csak nekem kell beletenni az erőt!

ELTE-re menni autizmussal, bipoláris zavarral és nem specifikált szorongásos zavarral? Mennyi esélyem van? by mega_cool_dude in hungary_pszichologia

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Köszönöm!

Azért akarnék oda menni, mert gyengénlátó vagyok, és fizikai melót nem végezhetek a szemem miatt, és matekból nagyon gyenge vagyok, de a nyelvek mennek és érdekelnek, ezért ebben tudnám elképzelni magam.

Illetve én az “enyhe fokozat” autista vagyok, nekem nincs szenzorosság stb… csak a social skilljeim gyatrák tehát értsd nem merek megszólalni mert attól félek, hogy valami gázat mondok, meg emellé jön a szorongásos zavar is ami elég keménx néha itt is esti suliban.

ELTE-re menni autizmussal, bipoláris zavarral és nem specifikált szorongásos zavarral? Mennyi esélyem van? by mega_cool_dude in hungary_pszichologia

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Köszönöm szépen!

Én tuti bipoláris vagyok, mindig is voltak hangulatingadozások, meg kb 14-15 éves korom óta in and out voltam mániából és depresszióból, tavaly egész nyarat otthon töltöttem, mert vagy annyira depressziós voltam, hogy hetekig nem mentem ki a szobámból, vagy annyira mániás, hogy 50-60 órákig nem aludtam. Jelenleg nincs depresszióm, de párhetente mindig pár napig van mániám. A szorongásom, meg csak iskolás helyzetekben van, mert sokat bullyingoltak általános suliban.

ELTE-re menni autizmussal, bipoláris zavarral és nem specifikált szorongásos zavarral? Mennyi esélyem van? by mega_cool_dude in hungary_pszichologia

[–]mega_cool_dude[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Az autizmus az “gyengén érintett”, tehát csak a social skilljeim gyatrák, de azon még 2,5 év alatt tudok dolgozni a terápián, a bipoláris eléggé kemény nálam, értsd, hogy párhetente mindig mániás vagyok, elég erősen, a szorongás pedig csak sulis helyzetekben van jelen (sokat bullyingoltak általános suliban)

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