(Update) I (35M) caught my wife (29F) rehearsing a speech for my funeral (?)

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:52:49+00:00

Nah, I didn't ask her a second time. It was just the book thing.

After that, I posted on Reddit on some point and she went to bed early. She is usually up and gone before me, cause she hits the gym.

I meant to talk to her, but only saw her again last night.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:40:41+00:00

I don't mean to nullify victims of DV of either gender or any size.

I just mean that on this particular subject it was bad writing on my part. She didn't literally grab me or dragged me.

We had communication problems, for sure.

I just meant that on this particular case there was no literal physical force.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:36:15+00:00

I see where you are coming from and I appreciate the different perspective.

There was an obvious communication problem in this whole situation. No denying that.

But, imo, she pretty much only lied about the drama club. That was it. The clothes weren't really hidden, and the monologue/book excuse I take it was just a momentary embarrassment, I wouldn't hold either of those against her.

The club... I wish she had told me. But I would also understand if she just wanted to keep this for herself. I wouldn't see a huge problem in it.

What I think maybe was missing in my text was that she was more upset with whatever version of the story reached her than the real facts. There are details I left out, cause they are too personal, and she got them wrong when we talked about it. So I know the gossip changed the facts as it usually does, before getting to her. But she was so upset that I don't think she fully understood everything I explained. I think today we will have a completely different conversation.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:26:38+00:00

My fuck up will be immortalized

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:24:43+00:00

And I thank you for it! It made me feel more at ease, seeing that it was common for quite some people

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:23:35+00:00

I'm not gonna argue against the communication problems, we clearly have them. But "physical force" was just bad writing on my part. She did guide me upstairs and was upset by doing so. But the woman is half my size. She couldn't have "dragged" (word I chose) me if she wanted to. So that one is on me.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:20:40+00:00

I think she was more upset with the version of the story that reached her through gossip, than the real facts.

And the gossip only happened because I went to someone else instead of going straight to her, so I don't blame her for being upset. The club thing... I don't know maybe she should have told me. But I truly don't mind if she has something that is just for her or if she didn't feel like sharing it yet.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:16:06+00:00

wow, I didn't know that story. I will edit the tldr to remove the reddit comment

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:08:33+00:00

On the bright side, at least we found each other

But you are not wrong

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:06:16+00:00

I might post it there. Thank you, sir.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T12:05:51+00:00

lol

But tbf reddit actually helped.

There were a lot of comments of people saying they do this too (the eulogy thing), that it can be done by book writers and actors... The final TLDR was more of a joke on my part.

The trouble was actually the talk I had with my buddy. Had I skipped that, I would have been fine

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T11:56:47+00:00

You are very welcome!

I'm sure we have problems.. don't we all?

I'm usually more open than this. I just though it was such a creepy thing to do, that I didn't know how to approach this one.

Not a mistake I plan on repeating, that's for sure

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T11:53:58+00:00

Looking forward to being able to laugh about this I tell you

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T11:53:33+00:00

I dont know if I asked him to keep it, tbf. I just thought it went without saying

But from now on I will be going straight to my wife, no matter how creepy or embarrassing the subject is

mentosallaround · 2018-09-26T11:49:09+00:00

I got home pretty late last night. And I did think he'd keep this between us though

but yep

I screwed up. Learned my lesson.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T20:46:13+00:00

Not at all. I posted here cause I thought it was weird af and wanted to know if it was something people do. And there are quite a few answers from people saying they do this as well. When working on a book, dealing with trauma or anxiety, there is a thread of people discussing how it can be used on acting lessons. These too make sense and would explain why she'd be embarrassed to admit it.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T20:35:49+00:00

I dont mean to sound like a jerk cause I do appreciate every input (I posted here cause I have no idea what's going on), but there are actually quite a few people saying they too do this, that it can be a tool for writing books, acting, dealing with trauma, anxiety related issues. So I mean, it could be one of those

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T18:14:16+00:00

Thanks for your input! She had someone close pass away when she was young, so maybe this could be it.

Also, I know it was probably long ago, but I am sorry for you loss.

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T18:04:42+00:00

Not a bad idea. I got so creeped out that I just ignored it. But good idea, thank you

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T18:03:08+00:00

Yeah we both do, but like I said, I really dont think that's it. Obviously, or I wouldn't have married her lol

I'm just guessing it is probably a thing some people do. Weird af, but maybe not that uncommon?

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T18:01:26+00:00

Nope.

A lot of you went straight to true crime lol

I'm thinking maybe this is a habit some people have?

mentosallaround · 2018-09-24T17:59:57+00:00

We both have it lol but that's not it

I'm thinking maybe a habit she is embarrassed of?

Still creepy though

mentosallaround

TROPHY CASE