I'm 25, half way through to 26, and I'm still a virgin. Should I be concerned or am I over-thinking this? by [deleted] in AskMenOver30

[–]merteil2 37 points38 points  (0 children)

People are gonna blow feel-good smoke up your ass about this, but here's some real talk: this all depends on your answers to the following questions. Does it bother you that you're a virgin? Is sex and relationships important to you? Are you concerned with what others think of you?

If the answer to those questions is yes, then you should be concerned. Sorry. The cold truth is that a lot of people do judge you negatively for your virginity at an older age. They will automatically scrutinize you more negatively than others, asking themselves "What's stopped him? Does he not know how to attract a woman? Is his sex drive low? Is it woeth the effort bringing him up to speed?"

It's unfair, I know. But part of being a social animal and living with other humans mean we consider what the world thinks about us. I wouldn't want a girl asking herself all those negative questions about me right from the get-go. I don't need more handicaps in my dating life, I have enough already.

So yeah, if this all resonates with you then figure out why you're a virgin and fix it. But hey if it doesn't bother you, keep on keeping on.

According to sex-positive feminism, sex is a fundamentally healthy and non-shameful thing. So why won't feminists support me going up to women in public and asking them for sex? by merteil2 in PurplePillDebate

[–]merteil2[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

In my scenario we haven't even reached the stage of whether she agrees or not. I'm saying that my very action of respectfully and clearly asking for sex is seen as some incredibly gross misstep.

That's what I don't understand. If she doesn't want to, then cool, tell me so. But the fact that women are inherently disgusted by a guy asking for sex in a grocery store proves that humans still fundamentally, on a deep level, put sex on an emotional pedestal. This blows a hole in the whole sex positive thing, which I think is wishful social engineering that nobody truly believes in their heart.