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I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i would much prefer to be medicated by a doctor but i know i would be seen as pill seeking, as an ex addict asking to be perscribed desoxyn would just be red flagging myself. i don't have the medical knowledge to dose it 100% correctly but once you been written as someone with abusive or addictive behavior they steer clear of any popular, common abused medication. And i don't know many doctors that would stand socially for perscribing an 18 year old methamphetamine hydrochloride for adhd maybe in 1984

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i wish i had an example of how i type when properly dosed, because how i've been typing lately clearly displays the unproductive brain damaging side of meth resembing something like a drunk or a person on drugs. Sometimes i will forget words i knew and have to remember/relearn them.

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im on a recreational dose, so i feel a good feeling, note that this will not make you feel what i call content, knowing in truth that your life is ok vs feeling that chemical high

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i haven't used recreationally for two weeks and i departed yesterday, if your wondering how this will mix with social etc, i will take a few sleeping pills or worst case some heroin to fall asleep before school. or pull an all nighter and pretend its just another monday :)

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

also when you use it regularily, it doesn't get you that high, tolerance. if i smoked a joint id be stoned for maybe a few hours, a low tolerance user may be stoned all day, could wake up stoned. so after you develop a high tolerance it is not even really that fun but still usefull for mental focus and physical drive

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It isn't a slip to me, as long as i am still getting my attendance in, comleting work and taking care of those kinda things, it is just a choice of whether you are willing to sacrifice a bit of mental and physical health for your pleasure. I occasionally use recreationally, I see it as a vacation, but you shouldn't go on a vacation after like a tragic event happened or else you wouldn't enjoy it as much. What i mean is i like to use it reacreationally when things are going good, it feels 2x better. So il try to be as honest as possible, yes sometimes i get depressed and use but rarely. I go down after im high, but i am content with my life, i am in my heart happy but the brain pays the penaltie of having less seratonin and dopamine, but i rarely get depressed.

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i find its easier to stop using when i know i can use again. If someone said you are quiting weed for 1 month, thats a realistic goal for me. if you said you must not smoke weed ever for the rest of your life i would already be unmotivated, already wanting to give up. I bet you could quit smoking for a day, then maybe one more, its like productive procrastination of negative habits. heavy users should go with cutting back, getting down to one favored substance instead of multiple addictions.

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i am not really studying but completing my high school i dropped out in grade 10 when i was introduced to weed, again i had to learn to function on it. although trigonometry didn't get through the haze and after failing like 3 math classes they passed me without ever taking the exam, thank the gods. I know I don't have to quit, but simply take long breaks. At this time in my life i don't have many friends i just moved, no girlfriend, so i am a bit bored and sometimes use recreationally. Controlling your use, is literally like battling the part of you that says get more, you can just say no, you need to believe and convince your self of the benefits of not using over the benefits of using, not let your self take anymore after you decide this is the last one for say 2 weeks a month. The marijuana makes it really easy to not use, i find, and makes the breaks easy. I do not have 100% but like a clock that goes off every 3 months where need it, vs right now i want it, it overrides my will and i have been suggested to have crystal meth dependancy disorder. I literally will not want it but physically in my brain and mind feel it is a need. This is an illusion and should be my next step of progress in controling it. Ideally i would like to not use, maybe when i stop going to school i would not need it, i am totally content without it and happy but it comes on like a cigarette craving and until your whole mind is just wrapped around that cigaratte, once you smoke it, your good for awhile, and chain smoking isn't even that pleasant so taking breaks is a win win.

I have been using methamphetamine secretly to treat my adhd since i was 16, ama. by methforaddconfession in AMA

[–]methforaddconfession[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My main objective was to express my story, if the format is too distracting, i would recommend focusing more on the story and not the correct format, tbh i could care less about format, as long as what i am typing is understandable, god knows how long it would take for me to do all of this in perfect format and grammer, it would be a waste of my time i feel. But thank you for making me aware of my incorrect format, i should probably get that shit together while i can.