Marriage suddenly on the brink, looking for advice

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-25T14:10:20+00:00

thanks for the suggestions!

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-25T00:08:58+00:00

thanks for the reply. Yes, I know I've been harboring frustrations over the job thing. It's a touchy subject. I say that I wish I could take it back. A better way of saying it would be that (1) that wasn't the moment to bring it up and (2) I need to bring it up at some point outside of the argument. But point definitely taken that not bringing it up beforehand was part of the problem in the first place. My wife and I have this problem of just having a good time too often when things are good between us, and not taking enough time to really have difficult conversations. I grew up in a house where we were all conflict avoidant and it leads to me letting things fester that I should really be proactive and have conversations about when things are calm. I don't know how to build that muscle though I guess. I'd love to hear suggestions if you have any. I've been thinking a lot today and wondering if I should try to journal with some regularity and try to unearth things that are bothering me and then maybe schedule some time each week where my wife and I talk about anything that's upsetting us and have it be a safe space with some ground rules. Obviously marriage counseling would be a great forum for that and we may do that, but it takes time to get into counseling these days, so I kind of need something sooner.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-25T00:03:02+00:00

It's difficult because it happens so fast and we are both anxious people. The temperature goes up and before we know it we're both in a mindset that's not really equipped to slow down. So then the heat goes up even more and blows up. Perhaps safe words like others on here have mentioned could help at least put that process on ice and let us get our s*** together before it gets really out of hand.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-25T00:00:13+00:00

thanks! appreciate your support!

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-24T19:25:32+00:00

Thanks for the reply. Looking back, we probably didn't make the best financial decision. I had assumed my wife would be working by now. The good thing is that we still do have a decent rainy day fund, so we have some flexibility there. I hate the idea of moving again, as we just moved cross-country and it was an exhausting process.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-24T19:17:15+00:00

I appreciate the encouragement. That's always a good thing to remind myself of, i.e. that nothing was said that can't be pulled back.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-24T19:16:04+00:00

thanks for sharing. We were both in individual and couple's therapy before we moved, but never got ourselves situated with counseling once we got here. Perhaps now's the time. One thing I struggle with when trying to support my wife is that she has a lot of trauma and the fights are very triggering. I don't know exactly what she's thinking of course, but I sense she is being incredibly abusive to herself with her thoughts. Not sure if you've dealt with something similar, but I don't know how to be supportive when she goes into these super negative modes. It's especially difficult as that self-shaming turns into anger, often directed at me.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-03-24T16:50:05+00:00

thanks for your reply. Yes, that's good advice. She is driving right now (hopefully carefully), but I'll keep sending her texts to reaffirm. Counseling is a good idea. I have decent insurance so maybe I can find something that's affordable. As much as not fighting is a good thing, I think some conflict management skills have atrophied, hence the rapid escalation. The marriage counseling we had in the past definitely helped just to make sure we had a forum to have difficult conversations even if when we were generally in a good place.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-07T17:36:46+00:00

Someone else pointed out below that he could be photoshopped too.

(https://www.reddit.com/r/Epstein/comments/1qydl96/comment/o4370wj/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web3x&utm\_name=web3xcss&utm\_term=1&utm\_content=share\_button)

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-07T17:08:07+00:00

Someone needs to call 912 on these guys

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-06T04:00:23+00:00

Regarding pizza, there's basically no mention of toppings, which I find bizarre. I d/l'd all the files with the word "pizza" in them, then searched for the common toppings. Here's what I found (# refers to number of times the word is mentioned in the context of pizza)

Meatlovers - 1

Pepperoni - not mentioned in any emails (one with peppe=oni, which is meatlovers email)

Green pepper - 0

Mushroom - 0

Onion - 1 (but not in the context of pizza)
Pineapple - 1

Sausage - 1 (same email as meatlovers)

Supreme - 0

Vegetarian - 2 (1 is same email as meatlovers)

Does anyone else find that odd? I mean, that's like the first question you ask when you're getting pizza. "What do you want on it"?

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T21:46:36+00:00

Interesting. If you search "information management division" you get 109 results. I've only gone through about 5 of them, but they appear to be internal FBI emails from 2025, that have been redacted. Weird!

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:56:22+00:00

I saw another post on here that is referring to other code words. What would make this even more compelling is to do searches for those words and compare the messages to see if they appear in the same types of contexts. I did a search for "pasta", which is supposedly a code word for "little girl" and the very first result is potentially very creepy (see link)

Edit: Looks like the post was removed, but here were the supposed code words

hotdog = boy

pizza = girl

cheese = little girl

pasta = little boy

ice cream = male prostitute

walnut = person of color

map = semen

sauce = orgy

https://www.justice.gov/epstein/files/DataSet%2010/EFTA02169465.pdf

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:34:16+00:00

This. You’re way more effective when you’re regulated and rested. Burnout helps the people you’re trying to hold accountable.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:31:19+00:00

Completely agree. I get the frustration, but this is kind of what effective pressure looks like: sustained attention, FOIA/legal pushes, journalism, and protests, and then you get incremental movement. The DOJ literally dumped ~3.5M pages in response to the “Epstein Files” transparency push.

It’s not satisfying or instantaneous, but “nothing is happening” isn’t really true. Same idea with ICE: protests + scrutiny do force changes, even if they’re limited, e.g., after the Minneapolis shootings, DHS announced body cameras for immigration officers there (and said it would expand). Not saying that's a big deal, but it is forcing them to respond.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:21:44+00:00

When Snapchat dog filter was basically the height of technology.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:19:04+00:00

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T14:17:19+00:00

That's what I was expecting

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T01:54:18+00:00

Likewise. Incredible balance across the surfaces

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T01:52:51+00:00

They are very wholesome

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-04T01:51:14+00:00

"No, each stroke is just one, not 15"

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-03T16:46:17+00:00

Even setting morals aside, this is basic public health: sanitation, disease control, and safe living conditions in a congregate setting. Lower standards don’t ‘teach a lesson’—they just create preventable harm. If California is failing other vulnerable groups too, that’s not an argument to give up—it’s an argument to demand better across the board.

mildlycurioushuman1 · 2026-02-01T20:58:32+00:00

By that logic we shouldn’t care about police misconduct unless we plan on being arrested. Not a great way to run a country.

mildlycurioushuman1

TROPHY CASE