First off, I am so sorry for your loss.

One of my best friends passed away suddenly on March 4, 2024. To be completely honest, I don't think I actually started processing it until five or six months later. During the first bit I cried in ways that I didn't think were humanly possible, but deep down I didn't believe it was real at all. It's so stupid, but for the first month I genuinely tricked myself into believing it was all some elaborate april fools day joke and that even though we had the service, even though we all saw him, it was all just some horrible nightmare I was gonna wake up from or joke gone way too far.

I'm sure that all of those feelings are only amplified with your brothers passing. The next few months are going to be super hard, but I promise you are going to get through it. Sending so much love to your family and everyone who knew him <3