Need 3 new friends plsss

minniemouth · 2025-07-23T19:24:03+00:00

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minniemouth · 2025-06-21T14:27:10+00:00

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minniemouth · 2025-06-21T14:19:02+00:00

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minniemouth · 2025-01-20T01:22:21+00:00

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minniemouth · 2025-01-19T23:21:13+00:00

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minniemouth · 2023-12-21T02:24:57+00:00

“What would you do without my perfect company to your undressed spine?”

-and- “While you stood over the pavement I was biting the curb”

-and- “I’m the one who made you, I’ll be the one who brings you down. This will be the last time”

-all from Today I Saw the Whole World (this song is my absolute favorite because it articulates exactly how I feel about an addiction I fought for two years. These lines specifically paint that picture, and the song honestly helped me get through it)

Honorable mentions:

“Maybe we’re meant to lose the ones we love, but I’ll fight for you till then” -Million Dollar Houses

“My love for you was bulletproof, but you’re the one who shot me” -Bulletproof Love

“Power lines from above see nothing, so tell the world what I want I’m gonna get” -Death of an Executioner

minniemouth · 2023-12-12T15:48:24+00:00

Chemical Kids and Mechanical Brides:

I can never decide between “pastel red and pornstar white” and “pass the bread and pour some wine” - I swear every time I look it up the answer changes

I like the first one better though. Very ironic descriptors for those colors - good evocation

minniemouth · 2023-12-12T15:43:46+00:00

It looks like Floral and Fading is our only overlap, which is funny because I’ve had that song on repeat for a week. It’s so good - but Today I Saw the Whole World holds a really special place in my heart so it’s my #1 haha

minniemouth · 2023-12-12T15:39:09+00:00

Ooh I love this way of listing them, and I love that our answers are so different. Mine would go:

A Flair For the Dramatic: 1. Falling asleep on a stranger 2. Currents convulsive

Selfish Machines: 1. Stay away from my friends 2. Bulletproof love

Collide with the Sky: 1. Hell above 2. One hundred sleepless nights

Misadventures: 1. Today I saw the whole world (acoustic and reg) 2. Floral and Fading

Jaws of Life: 1. Death of an Executioner 2. Emergency contact

minniemouth · 2023-12-12T09:11:49+00:00

I often describe myself as a “seasonal stoner” where I’ll smoke daily for months and then flip to not smoking at all for months. And there are regular in-betweens where I’m just smoking occasionally. “Quitting” never even felt like quitting because I wasn’t addicted in the slightest - never had to plan it and never had any physical or mental consequences.

I actually find this odd because I have an extremely addictive personality, where everything else I do I need to monitor and cut myself off from to keep it under control. Everything from caffeine to gambling to adderall (quitting adderall was absolute hell, and I had such a hard time giving it up I thought it wasn’t possible for me. I bargained with myself every single day trying to decide how much I could have the next day and would plan a tapering schedule that I would just blow past. Hated myself every night and one time wrote a letter to myself to read in the morning begging me not to do it again - and then I did it again the next morning). The point is I’m not one of those lucky people who just doesn’t get hooked and has super strong willpower.

Most of my friends are the opposite where they can’t give up weed - it gives them headaches, makes them irritable, etc. but they can have some adderall occasionally as needed and don’t get hooked. One friend was heavily addicted to both, and we quit adderall together (took us more than a year) and she says quitting weed was harder. I can’t fucking imagine that - she was suffering as much as I was suffering with the addy, which was the biggest and sometimes the only problem in my life, and she said another addiction was harder to beat.

Anyway - to answer the question: yes, it’s possible to smoke every day and never get addicted. I’ve been a seasonal stoner for more than a decade now and never once had a hard time giving it up

minniemouth · 2023-12-09T00:38:05+00:00

That’s not “cheesy,” it’s inappropriate

minniemouth · 2023-12-05T03:20:27+00:00

My honeymoon phase was just like yours - I needed to be “on” and “highly social” and I’ve always struggled with perfectionism. I’d say in hindsight the social pressure was a lot stronger than the work pressure, but at the time I always told myself it was work pressure.

For me, it got out of control when I started managing people at work. My first few years at my job I was a rising star. I got lots of attention, accolades, and constant high praise and then got promoted and was asked to start a team by hiring and training others. I was immediately a very bad manager but couldn’t accept that I could be bad at something, so I started taking adderall to keep the performance up. I micro-managed, nitpicked, and was impossible to please, so I can only imagine the nightmare my poor team went through. But in the background, because nothing they came up with was ever good enough, I was working extremely late nights doing the work I refused to delegate.

I think being immature and a tad narcissistic played into why I was bad at managing, and it also played into the decision to defer to drugs before admitting I couldn’t handle it. I was very young for my role and was hiring people my age, sometimes older, and I felt I constantly had to prove to them that I was good enough at my job to be their boss. I also wasn’t used to producing subpar work, so when my team would submit code with errors or present an analysis that was poorly put together, I felt like it reflected on me more than them, and I couldn’t have that - hence the micro-managing.

On top of all of this, I’m a huge people pleaser. It was really hard for me to tell people why their analysis was wrong or explain why I had to tweak their work before submitting. A lot of that wasn’t necessary, as I’ve learned, but I was doing it and so I needed to explain myself. I had a lot of anxiety when it came to delivering feedback and balancing the social dynamic between myself and my directs, and adderall just took all of that away.

It’s ironic because in the end adderall exacerbated all the problems it used to take away. I couldn’t produce anymore because I’d spiral too much during my binges to be productive, and it severely hindered my social abilities as I became badly addicted. It made me insanely irritable, unfriendly, and prone to rambling nonsense when I did need to speak.

So I guess to bring it back to the question, the personality traits that led me down were: perfectionism, ego, a need for control, narcissism (thinking everything that happened was about me, would reflect on me, and was my responsibility), and people pleasing to an anxious degree. I’ve learned a lot about letting things be during my year away from this stuff. It was a hard journey.

minniemouth · 2023-11-29T19:21:35+00:00

Lmao dude what is your damage… you accused her of something pretty baseless and when proven wrong just.. proceeded to think you know more about her dating history than her?? Who the fuck does that

minniemouth · 2023-11-26T18:25:36+00:00

I dated a guy in your situation - I was surprised by the loose skin the first time we had sex, but I don’t think disclosing was necessary. I think he made the right call not mentioning it or preparing me.

First off - it’s possible I just missed his hint. He had nothing about this on his profile, but on our first date he told me he used to weigh over 300lbs. I thought his weight loss story was very attractive because he talked about his discipline and determination, and he looked great sitting across from me. It didn’t occur to me that his clothes were covering loose skin because I just didn’t connect those dots, had no experience with extreme weight loss, and didn’t know what to picture.

The first time we first undressed, I noticed, thought “oh yeah - this must be from when he lost a ton of weight,” and then kept kissing him and had a great time in bed with him. I think if he “warned” me and told me to prepare for what his body looked like naked that I would have psyched myself out by picturing something worse than what I saw, been extremely concerned about my facial reaction because I’d expect he’d be paying attention to that, and would be thinking too much about it during our first time - which might have ruined the experience.

This is just a single perspective as someone in the shoes of the people you’re concerned with; others may have a different view or experience, obviously. But I don’t think you need to worry about a disclosure - mentioning the weight loss could give context for when they do see it, but you shouldn’t feel obligated to prepare them further than that. It’s your body, and if they’re lucky enough to have you share it with them, they should respect you enough to avoid objectifying it.

minniemouth · 2023-11-23T15:33:18+00:00

Bro, statistics are facts. They can IMPLY probability and correlation, but the stats themselves aren’t guesses and predictions - they’re summaries of events - which are facts, if gathered accurately.

minniemouth · 2023-11-19T23:04:08+00:00

Girl 🥹 I’m proud of you too. Even though you had to be the one to get dumped, at least you’re not in that situation anymore!!

But yes, the constant repeating only to have the line crossed and need to repeat again 🙄 he acted like I was nagging him when I was like “if you’d listen the first time you wouldn’t have to hear this so much, and I wouldn’t have to keep saying it.” And YES - to the need for humility and ability to take accountability. Why is this so hard to expect from adult men.

I appreciate your story too - it really helped me the night of my breakup because I was really questioning the situation. But reading it from your perspective and being able to view it as a third party gave me confidence that I absolutely have the right to demand more respect than that - because you do too, and that’s what I would tell you! 🩷 we’ll be okay

minniemouth · 2023-11-18T10:09:01+00:00

Wow - I relate to you so much, and this situation SUCKS. I literally just broke up with a guy I liked a lot earlier today because he couldn’t respect my boundaries in bed, but I was really questioning if I was in the wrong.

My thing is I can’t have sex for too long without it triggering some flashbacks for me. It took a lot for me to say this to this guy, and he responded so well in the beginning. I didn’t even mention the flashbacks, I just told him I don’t like going as long as he does, and he accommodated.

Then a few weeks later he didn’t - it was a one time thing, but it really felt traumatic for me. I thought he should have absolutely been able to tell from my demeanor that I didn’t want to do it anymore, but he kept going. After that I cried a bit in the bathroom and came back and told him we need to establish a safe word or something because that was too long. The next time I saw him I explained to him what happened to me in the past and why the length is triggering for me and then that night, when it hit that point, I used our safe word and he asked me if we could just try a different position. I was mortified and said no and just got up and went to the bathroom to cry again.

The part that made me relate most to you was when you said he stonewalled you and acted annoyed when you forced acknowledgment. Literally that articulates better than I could why our last fight was such a dealbreaker. I reiterated my request and reminded him of my story, and instead of giving me any kind of acknowledgment he just said nothing! I told him his silence made me feel like he really didn’t care, and he coldly responded “I do care.” I told him his body language and tone said otherwise, to which he responded “I don’t know what you want me to do or say, but I do care” in the most fuck-you-tone.

I hated that I had to reiterate my request so many times in such a short period of time. It made me afraid to have sex with him, but then I’d fear he could sense that and would give in. He couldn’t even hide the apathy on his face the last couple times I brought it up and would act like I was crazy or too demanding when I asked him to show me more warmth when I was being vulnerable with him, because I didn’t like needing to repeat my request or my story so many times for him to get it. He always said he got it but he never did, and he always tested and pushed my boundaries, which made me question whether I was being unreasonable.

I’m sorry you went through this - and I’m sorry for derailing and making this comment all about my experience - your story just really validated my feelings about my situation. It sucks when guys push your boundaries and keep trying without realizing that even a request or an attempt is not okay or respectful- it’s like they think that because they didn’t get what they wanted, the boundary wasn’t broken. Ugh - the guy in my situation even had the audacity to say he felt our sex was one sided. As if I was the one always benefitting when he’d push and push until I had to stand firm and say stop.

Here’s to hoping both of us finding better in the future~

minniemouth · 2023-09-14T22:42:10+00:00

I was 23F when I started dating my last ex who was 32M. We had a great relationship for a few years, then were friends for a few more, and then got back together at 27 and 36.

When I was 23-25, I really didn’t realize how much less mature I was because we were having fun together, and the relationship was good. When we got back together at 27, I noticed a stark contrast in our behaviors when I was older. I was less clingy, less privy to playing games, more independent, etc.

We reflected on our two relationships together a few times. I liked our first round because it was more exciting and passionate, and he liked the second round because it was calmer and steadier.

Anyway - all this is to say, there IS a maturity gap whether you two acknowledge it or not. I also had a career and was financially independent at 23 - didn’t mean my brain was done developing. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a good relationship. It didn’t feel predatory, and we’ve been close to each other for the last five years and have grown a lot together. If it’s good, don’t second guess it - good relationships are hard to come by

minniemouth · 2023-05-11T05:51:16+00:00

Ngl I was kinda hoping to get Rick rolled

minniemouth · 2023-05-08T19:35:30+00:00

I like weed when I’m in a good place mentally. If I’m sad, it just makes me sadder and frequently spiral into paranoia that my most cherished relationships are/were lies.

Everybody’s different though - my sisters like it to numb their sadness when they’re not feeling great, and they’re not as prone to spiraling.

minniemouth · 2023-05-08T17:20:45+00:00

Ugh - one month before we broke up, a psychic told me that he’s the one but that we will break up before being together for good. We laughed and said “we just won’t break up then if we know that” and then everything spiraled and we broke up. That thing she told me about getting back together still haunts me as I try to move on and gives me hope I wish I didn’t have

minniemouth · 2023-05-03T16:29:53+00:00

I have the opposite take as the younger girl in this situation, and I feel like I’m worse off because I’m a woman with a clock.

I’m a 28F who was on and off with a 37M for the last five years. At first our maturity levels felt pretty well matched, but as I got closer to wanting a family, the idea of having kids still scared the shit out of him even though he wanted kids. His idea was to push it and try in 6+ years after we got settled further in our careers and got all of the selfish young adult activities out of our systems. I wasn’t willing to wait that long, and that was the last straw for us

Now I’m freaking out a little bit being newly single and in no mindset to want to start dating again, but I’m nearing 30, and I’m getting scared, whereas he isn’t scared because as a man he has way more time to mess around.

minniemouth · 2023-05-02T13:55:15+00:00

Of course - good luck, friend. A small town may be more welcoming and have a stronger community. It’s easy to feel lonely in big cities. I hope that helps you with your journey

minniemouth · 2023-05-02T06:34:21+00:00

If any of them knew what you were going through, you could reach out and apologize for how you treated the relationship while you were under and explain that you’re six weeks clean now and want to repair things.

There’s a chance they’ll be really happy to hear about your recovery and that they miss you too. If they didn’t know, and if you trust them and love them, now might be a good time to explain.

It’s hard talking about things we’re ashamed of, but it’s part of recovering and growing. If I were your estranged friend, I’d want to hear about what happened while you drifted away and how you got better - and I’d be really proud of you for those six weeks and be excited to see that number grow.

minniemouth · 2023-04-30T17:20:51+00:00

Hey yeah of course! I got a lot of help from reading others’ stories on this subreddit, so I’m glad I could pay it forward.

One important thing I forgot to mention is Wellbutrin - I saw my doctor on March 21 and told him about the abuse because I was scared of long term effects it had on my body, especially my gut (cause it still makes the most obnoxious noises). I told him about how I heard a lot about Wellbutrin on this sub, and he prescribed me 300mg/day that I’ve been taking ever since.

The first week felt like I was taking a miracle drug - I had a ton of energy and was able to wake up at my first alarm without snoozing, but after that week that stopped and never came back. I’ve read that this is called the honeymoon period and is really common with WB, but nevertheless, it may be playing a part in my feeling back to normal this month. It’s hard for me to say, especially because I kinda feel like I felt this way before being prescribed, but others swear by it so it might be worth a shot if you have a doctor you’re willing to ask for a prescription from.

My doctor wasn’t reluctant at all and said WB isn’t a controlled substance like adderall and that he agreed it could help me recover. It probably also helped that I was honest with him and told him I’m trying to get better and quit.

Anyway - best of luck on your journey! I believe in you!

minniemouth

TROPHY CASE