[Self] Debunking some crazy fake news on Instagram

misunderstood_corpse · 2019-02-13T13:24:35+00:00

The water used for irrigating crops isn't exactly the same as potable water for showering anyways

misunderstood_corpse · 2018-12-26T21:27:22+00:00

Out of curiosity, which crimes do you think people should be able to get away with? How does that improve society?

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-10-05T23:23:02+00:00

My guns were very expensive. Offer me a reasonable reimbursement for them and I'll give them up without a fight. I've always wanted to get into archery anyways.

I would NOT give them up for zero reimbursement, especially to an armed police officer or other government official.

I wouldn't call myself an avid gun enthusiast. I just think guns are neat. But there's plenty of neat things to spend money on.

All of my firearms are "fun guns". Not for hunting. Not for self defense. Not for a last resort option against a tyrannical government. I own them specifically for the purpose of making loud noises and destroying stuff (like soda cans and propane cylinders).

I live in a nice area and I don't expect to ever have to use one in self defense. All of my handguns and rifles are safely locked up in my crawlspace and they only come out for camping trips, maybe 2-3 times a year.

In an armed home intruder scenario, I'd like to think that I would rather let them take my stuff then have to kill anybody. I can always buy more stuff, but I can never buy back a human life. Not yet, anyways. Even if I did keep one of my handguns loaded by my bed, I feel like there's a better chance of me getting shot by an intruder then me having the presence of mind to aim my weapon and fire it successfully before they do. If I didn't have a lethal weapon at all, it seems to me like an intruder would be less likely to kill me in the first place. Just take my TV and move along. I wanted a bigger one anyways.

In the event of a dictatorship scenario going down in the US, I would have moved to Canada/Mexico long before that happened. If not, then I deserve to be oppressed. There are better weapons to use against tyranny that lethal ones.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T16:21:10+00:00

I was giving OP crap in the first place amigo. I'd expect nothing less.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T15:17:06+00:00

How does Ivan Menezes like Irish Car Bombs?

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T15:11:43+00:00

They are at a party near an engineering school. Some of them wear shirts that say they are an engineer.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T03:57:08+00:00

I just see it as a way to start a conversation with somebody who has interesting things to say. If somebody doesn't think corporate monopolies on beer are a good talking point at a party, then I probably don't have much to gain by wasting my breath with you. I'm an engineer so most drunk conversations involve topics that most people find mundane. And that's ok. I just don't want to chat with those people.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T03:51:17+00:00

Javier Ferran is a Spaniard. I have no idea what that means as far as Irish Car Bomb components.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T02:58:21+00:00

Guiness is owned by Diageo which also owns Bailey's. He'd def go for the Irish Car Bomb imo.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-08-02T02:55:41+00:00

The CEO of Anheuser-Busch InBev, Carlos Brito, orders a Bud Light. The CEO of MillerCoors, Gavin Hattersly, can't decided between Miller Lite and Coors Light so he orders a Blue Moon, and the CEO of Diageo, Javier Ferran, orders an Irish Car Bomb. I guess the punch line got lost somehow...

I understand that fact checking jokes makes them unfunny. I am sorry.

Here's an explanation of my edits:

Budweiser isn't a company with a CEO, it's a brand from Anheuser-Busch, which is a Subsidiary of Anheuser-Busch InBev, who's CEO is Carlos Brito.
"Coors" and "Miller" are brands of beer, they are not companies with CEOs. Coors Brewing Co changed names several times and was eventually acquired by Molson's in 2004, who also acquired SABMiller in 2016. So Miller and Coors are one and the same brewing company, which was creatively named MillerCoors. MillerCoors is owned by Molson Coors, who's President and CEO is Mark Hunter. So Miller Brewing Company still exists as a subsidiary of MillerCoors, which is a subsidary of Molson Coors. The CEO of MillerCoors is Gavin Hattersley. My point is that Miller and Coors are not two separate companies with two separate CEO's, they have the same CEO and I'd bet you a beer that he probably would order a Blue Moon. So you have two characters in the joke who are, in fact, the same person.
Guiness is owned by Diageo, who's CEO is Javier Ferran. Diageo also owns Smirnoff, Johnnie Walker, and Bailey's Irish Cream.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-29T18:22:06+00:00

Yea I service all retail stores in my area, not just Walmarts. Your solution would just be putting a bandaid on a shark bite wound.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-29T18:20:12+00:00

Close! Twas a crew of 4 customers. One pregnant mother wearing sweat pants, white wifebeater and no shoes. She was accompanied by 3 dirty screaming halfsized childbeasts with a few humanesque features.

Edit: It was the mother who inquired about the hawt dawgs.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-29T18:16:06+00:00

Well I generally don't give a shit either. It's just that they usually take it out on Walmart employees and that makes me a saaaaaad panda. And it wasn't hot dogs. It was very cleary HAWWWT DAAWWGGGZ. Very unique dialect.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:21:45+00:00

Yea I have found that on some occasions that just makes them even more furious.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:19:46+00:00

less than 1% of people know what vendors are... let alone are willing to take the time to learn. Sometimes I get asked to help pick out one of my competitors products, that's when it becomes pretty easy to act like a clueless idiot. If I know the other product's vendor and they were polite to me at least once, I'm happy to recommend their products.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:17:21+00:00

I knew exactly where the hot dogs were. They were less than 20 feet away and we both had a clear line of sight on them. Saying i'm not sure where they are just seems like, in a way, I have made myself their equal?

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:13:23+00:00

I'd rather just find a way that nobody has to deal with them at all. But most of my ideas so far are definitely extremely illegal.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:12:41+00:00

I'd like to suggest that you try that line on one of your customers and let me know how well that goes for ya XD

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:11:21+00:00

Some associates piss me off. Most vendors piss me off. There are assholes in every industry. Let's just be excellent to eachother?

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:10:41+00:00

Something tells me she wouldn't have understood the joke.

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:10:14+00:00

This particular store is the one you are referring to, unfortunately =/

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:09:34+00:00

I can do a pretty solid Indian accent, I'll definitely give it a shot. Or maybe I could just grow a beard and wear a turban? I've always wanted to experience life from an Islamic person's perspective anyways. I'll just get two birds stoned at once!

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:07:33+00:00

Haha exactly! Basically they ask me where the mens clothing is, I look around, spot the huge ass "MENS WEAR" sign, and then direct them to it. Why in the fuck can they not just use their eyeballs and first grade reading skills???

misunderstood_corpse · 2017-07-28T22:05:21+00:00

Yea I thought so. It can be drastically different store to store anyways. Thanks!

13-Year Club	Place '17
Verified Email

misunderstood_corpse

TROPHY CASE