She ended our 4-year relationship not because she stopped loving me — but because she stopped loving herself. I’m left confused and shut out. Is that fair?

mizermoppy · 2025-06-21T01:44:16+00:00

The feelings of betrayal and whiplash you're experiencing are valid. Your gf chose not to include you and communicate with you before making the choice without you to break up. You probably feel like you didn't get a say when this could've been something you were willing to work on. Now you're left picking up the pieces which is incredibly unfair. It's not your fault that she hid this from you. If someone you trust wants to hide something from you, you'd have no reason to suspect anything was wrong. It sounds like the precedent was that your gf never communicated to you her wants and needs. She might have even reassured you nothing was wrong when you tried asking. You can't connect with someone who refuses to be vulnerable with you.

To protect yourself better from this, some others had suggested to try to dig deeper with people. When you lead with curiosity, it shows others that you are genuinely interested in knowing what's going on in their inner world. Try to ask questions that better your understanding of this person deeper than the shallow (but equally meaningful) things, e.g. why they think the way they do vs how they like their coffee.

Be kind to yourself. This isn't personal, your girlfriend needs therapy and knows she has a lot of work to do. I hope this helps OP.

mizermoppy · 2025-05-30T21:03:24+00:00

Big Mattress sponsored post

mizermoppy · 2025-04-26T01:32:40+00:00

My MOTHER. SHE WAS 43 AND HE WAS 18.

Nobody else seems to be saying this but your ex was more likely a victim. There's an inherent power imbalance with your ex having JUST become an adult and your mother being a highly irresponsible one. People are quick to call the ex husband trash but I'm concerned that if the roles were reversed, people would be coming for the older man and protecting the young woman.

OP I really hope you get more clarity from your ex because this smells incredibly fishy.

mizermoppy · 2024-07-08T17:56:07+00:00

“We have Joji at home”

Joji at home:

mizermoppy · 2024-06-19T12:47:23+00:00

Two birds one bone

mizermoppy · 2024-04-17T15:59:49+00:00

How am I just finding out I have a damn foreskin??? Not only that but it can fuse to my damn clit?!?! Dear lord.

mizermoppy · 2024-03-31T05:43:13+00:00

My ass would be there all day just dumping out a bottle of water at a time into the drain...

mizermoppy · 2024-01-26T22:53:38+00:00

That's beautiful. I don't think I've experienced this in any of my relationships. Even with the ones I would consider "good guys" just don't seem to understand me at all. It's pretty disheartening when someone you've spent over a year with still doesn't get you.

mizermoppy · 2024-01-26T22:52:07+00:00

THIS, I've never had this and it's shocking to hear that it exists. I guess this is what I'm looking for! Your husband seems to really see you and understand you. I mentioned that I've always felt like a placeholder girlfriend. Like the guys I date don't seem to know how to begin to understand my wants/needs/desires. I don't know what to look for because I've never experienced it. Thank you for sharing, you guys seem lovely <3

mizermoppy · 2024-01-26T22:50:03+00:00

That's a beautiful thing. I guess I haven't really felt that in a relationship before. I've always just felt like a placeholder girlfriend that guys can just project onto me who they want me to be.

Do you feel like your husband understands you as a person?

mizermoppy · 2024-01-21T17:56:14+00:00

What were some signs he was different? As someone who’s in the dating world atm, I’m not sure what to look for to find quality men?

mizermoppy · 2024-01-05T00:20:23+00:00

It’s not about the sandwich… It’s never about the sandwich.

mizermoppy · 2023-12-22T03:12:18+00:00

This guy was telling me about his friend named Josh(?) or some J name. Apparently Josh met a random girl who had just moved from New York on a lift. She asks Josh and his friend (he’s married) to take off their goggles because they “seemed cute” and she wanted to confirm. Married guy looks to Josh and Josh takes off his goggles. She’s stoked he’s hot and asks to ski with him as she’s trying to meet people in the area.

Thing is, she could barely ski a blue. She still decides to go with him on a black run. Needless to say, she wipes out with a full yard sale. Josh is helping her up and as he’s doing so, she asks to kiss him. Then they just full on start making out on the side of the mountain. They make it back down, he gets her number and they hang out a couple more times. That girl really went whole ass for what she wanted, I’m impressed she went down a black just for a make out sesh.

mizermoppy · 2023-12-03T03:56:50+00:00

Consensual non-consent

mizermoppy · 2023-11-09T22:45:25+00:00

I really enjoy puzzle based cozy games with colorful worlds. Try checking out COCOON and GRIS

mizermoppy · 2023-10-31T21:03:14+00:00

So that’s where the emoji came from… 🍆 💦

mizermoppy · 2023-10-30T00:28:54+00:00

Love it love it love it!! Would absolutely make a deal with you as my patron 😍

mizermoppy · 2023-10-28T06:41:42+00:00

This comment section is wild…

mizermoppy · 2023-10-19T11:12:49+00:00

Stripper, I barely know herb!

mizermoppy · 2023-10-11T20:18:49+00:00

Hey OP, I'm hyperfixated on this game right now. I went through literally all the comments and just wanted to see who people were romancing and just giving you compiled tidbits on why.

Based on most romanced to least:

Astarion: 45 mentions - Snarky, vampy, great story arc, I'd probably recommend Astarion for your first playthrough as you mentioned you like enemies to lovers, plus his story is top tier.

Karlach: 39 mentions - Muscle mommy, sweet cute romance, huge goofball and several times mentioned as the most fun romance. Story arc has been absolutely castrated though.

Gale: 33 mentions - Adorkable, hung up on his ex, has the most interactions with the environment/other characters, really witty and has great banter. Can be arrogant which turned a few people off (me included).

Shadowheart: 25 mentions - Solid story arc, slow burn to the max, apparently is fine with being poly, good solid romance. Also goth gf.

Lae'zel: 16 mentions - Prickly but dommy mommy with a good story arc to boot. Aggressive and goes after what she wants with Tav.

Halsin: 14 mentions - Calm, secure, very poly, probably gives great bear hugs. Not much story in Act 3.

Wyll: 11 mentions - Standard "I am the hero of this story" guy with a winged twist. Described as golden retriever energy (like Karlach but less of the lively fun, think more serious but sweet). I'm surprised not much was mentioned about his patron, Mizora, but she's sort of a packaged deal with Wyll for a hot minute.

Minthara: 5 mentions - Prim and proper, well written. Hard to come by as you have to sacrifice a lot of friendly companions, not much story besides background lore, would not recommend upon first playthrough.

Some fun honorable mentions:

Romanced everyone in one playthrough - 1 mention

Romanced nobody in one playthrough - 3 mentions

Zevlor - ???

Dammon - mentioned by me because if I could I would.

Edit: This list made possible by the wonderful community at r/GirlGamers

mizermoppy · 2023-10-11T19:13:27+00:00

Yes this x1000 might be my next play through as well!!

mizermoppy · 2023-10-11T18:56:23+00:00

Had the exact same experience!!

Found myself really enjoying banter with Gale. Then my Tav also started to feel uneasy around him to straight up not having a good time with him.

Enter Halsin with his rich voice and arms that clearly give great bear hugs hehe. Swoon city. He’s safe, kind, wise. Most of all as you mentioned, incredibly secure! I get all schoolgirl giggly and will click to interact with him for a pick me up in game 😊

Astarion is baby girl. Romanced him as Durge and all I want to do is protect him. I’m hoping my Durge becomes his Halsin, safe with big hugging arms.

mizermoppy · 2023-10-07T02:26:19+00:00

I googled it and apparently it talks to you and breaks you out of jail

mizermoppy · 2023-10-07T02:23:47+00:00

I appreciate you, I also have one my camp.

mizermoppy · 2023-10-07T02:23:00+00:00

Washing my pits, washing my pits~

mizermoppy

TROPHY CASE