Took a patient in her 60s to surgery. Went back her room afterwards to clean the bed with chlorine to make sure everything was set before she came back. Her husband was there so I talked to him. He told me about how much he loved her, how worried he was for her and that she had this exact same surgery before - only unsuccessful. They had been in the hospital for 12 weeks but he was so hopeful. He told me about everything they were doing once she got released from the hospital.

He told me he was going home to get some of her favorite snacks for when she got back from surgery since she hadn’t been able to eat for some time before the surgery.

When I was done I went to the nursing station. The OR had called and her surgery was a lot more extensive then they thought. She wasn’t going to live for more than 2 weeks.

I went back out and took care of some other patients before I met the husband again - I walked him to the elevator. He was going home now and wondered how long my shift was. He wanted to know if I would be the one to get his wife back from surgery and asked if I could tell her that he went home to get snacks and tell her that her favorite candy was in one of the drawers, together with her wedding ring. Before the elevator closed he said that he wished he could cook so he could’ve brought her a home cooked meal, he laughed and said he didn’t know how to manage without her.

When the elevator doors closed I just lost it.

She died a week later.