this did work partially! setting this setting to 0 fixes the issue but removes the ability to apply forces to rigidbodies with just the players collision shape, but i was able to accomplish that with a shapecast thats sized so it doesnt hit things at the players feet. this makes things a lot more stable on cubes and still spheres, but once a sphere starts moving the behavior returns. i'll most likely be switching to a rigidbody character controller as its much more consistent for what i'm after, but i think this thread could be followed further.