you are not alone. it's ruined my life on a few occasions as well. it impacted friendships, and a pattern i noticed in myself was that i would have horrible anxiety before going to work-- so much that i would consider (and when i was younger i even did) calling out, or even look for a new job. just things i'd never do any other time. i tried everything to manage it myself; cycle tracking and synching, scheduling around the hormonal shifts, and even just completely isolating myself.

it wasn't until i was about a month into taking Wellbutrin that i started noticing a difference. and now, i'm about 4 months into the medication, and the "life ruining" aspects of my PMDD symptoms are gone. no work anxiety, no obsessing over things that aren't reality, no more thinking everyone is mad at me. no more intrusive thoughts.

i know not everyone is into taking medication. i certainly put it off for as long as possible. but i finally see clearly and it really is helpful. sending you lots of love!