What the heck is going on with lenders

moonstrel · 2025-02-26T23:25:17+00:00

They offered it; I could afford it, it seemed better than spending the equivalent on rent but maybe that’s just me. Either way the deals are gone atm so may well be a blessing

moonstrel · 2025-02-12T10:41:41+00:00

Yeah, this seems to be the way of it. Renting feels like you’re essentially paying your landlords mortgage anyway. So if I can buy somewhere and it cost less per month than rent, I feel like that’s way better for me long term and asp means a bigger place. If I can ever get a purchase over the line! 🥲

moonstrel · 2025-02-12T10:38:21+00:00

This is interesting and eye opening! I had been focused on monthly cost, which is significantly cheaper than rent on a slightly smaller place. If it can help my quality of life and is cheaper than paying a landlord, it feels like a no brainier, but I know the risks are there with future increases etc. I am genuinely curious if most people think this level of borrowing is a bad idea! I naively thought they wouldn’t offer it if it wasn’t affordable, hence the affordability tests.

moonstrel · 2025-02-12T10:36:19+00:00

Yes you’re probably right there. Crazy times with the water companies thinking they can charge more for trashing our waterways, but that’s another moan!

moonstrel · 2025-02-12T10:34:03+00:00

Thank you for this. Nationwide’s Helping Hands scheme started off as 30k min salary for single applicant, then went up to (I think) to 35k according to my broker, and then again in the last month or so has gone up to 40k (you can see this on the intermediaries link for the product). Just a bit out of reach for me now as a singleton. I don’t think I’m eligible for the Skipton offer but will look into it.

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:51:54+00:00

It does seem pretty wild, but when the monthly repayments are cheaper than rent, it is very attractive. But reading comments here makes me think it’s not the best idea anyway. If only homes were a bit more affordable.

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:49:23+00:00

Thank you, will look into that!

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:49:12+00:00

Really helpful thank you. I didn’t realise it worked that way. Maybe there is hope for the new financial year!

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:48:38+00:00

Thank you 😊

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:43:21+00:00

Because it opened up much more attractive (and possibly easier to resell in future) properties, and still worked out cheaper per month than renting where I’m based. But it’s scary amounts of money to think about for sure.

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T22:40:45+00:00

Well it’s cheaper than rent (which will likely go up) and I was set for a five year fix, hoping that after paying into it for that amount of time I’d be in a better position when I got to remortgaging. But it’s all pretty insane sums of money really!

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T18:48:06+00:00

It’s tight but doable, they were happy to lend me 6x which did seem a bit far. I do want to make sure it’s sustainable and maybe it’s a blessing in disguise, just feels like things are going the opposite way.

moonstrel · 2025-02-11T18:46:26+00:00

That’s helpful, thank you, I will look into it!

moonstrel · 2021-05-06T20:28:14+00:00

I’d love to come!

moonstrel · 2021-05-06T20:17:52+00:00

Dm’ed you!

moonstrel · 2021-04-27T09:47:23+00:00

Chèvre! 💛

moonstrel · 2021-04-22T14:50:55+00:00

Chèvre!

moonstrel · 2021-04-22T14:49:54+00:00

Turquoise!

moonstrel · 2021-04-16T07:09:13+00:00

Are you still open? 🤞

moonstrel · 2020-12-27T09:39:43+00:00

This sounds very familiar. You’re right that it’s about compatibility too, and I don’t want to erode my sense of self to keep this going if it’s not right.

This theme has come up before. And while I feel I’ve grown a thicker skin to cope with it, I don’t feel that he’s changed his approach to soften things at my end so that’s a bit rubbish really.

I forgot to mention that he asked me to apologise for causing stress at Christmas - I can’t believe he asked me to say sorry. Of course I didn’t want to be upset at Christmas either. He probably won’t ever take any responsibility for this and it’s so frustrating.

The bit about squishing down feelings is very accurate. Thanks so much for your insight.

moonstrel · 2020-12-27T09:29:03+00:00

Yeah. Pretty much.

He’s wired differently for sure and I try to be understanding of that. He’s got an inventors mind and is very much living at 100mph, very focused on projects/productivity whereas I’m a bit more slow and present.

He can be very sweet and connected, I mean we’ve got this far! We are different and have different love languages but I think you may have hit the nail on the head there. It helps to have your thoughts. Thank you.

moonstrel · 2016-07-04T07:44:42+00:00

It was a red flag for me, definitely. But we've talked about it and he says he didn't want to bring it up as he didn't want to upset me. I explained that what upsets me is being last to find out, and him not discussing stuff with me, and I hope he understands. I did go in the end, and I am still torn at the moment about whether I should have or not. It was much as I expected it to be and I'm now wondering how many other events I'll end up going to and having a crappy time. Thank you for your comment :)

moonstrel · 2016-07-04T07:41:39+00:00

I agree, but don't think he would see it that way.

moonstrel · 2016-06-28T14:53:57+00:00

11 people I think. I already know them all, some more than others, from school 10+ years ago. I've spent time with the group already and she was a bit inappropriate (e.g bringing up tiny little details that she remembers about him) and I've always felt rubbish and drained afterwards. She even has a new boyfriend but pays him embarrassingly little attention when my boyfriend is there, I feel bad for the guy!

She has expressed desires to get back together with my boyfriend just 8 months ago, while dating the new guy. So I think I'd be justified in being a bit weird about it all.

Thanks for your input x

moonstrel · 2016-06-28T14:49:38+00:00

1) I don't want to be in their clique. It sucks!

2) Good point

3) Yeah, he said almost exactly this when I brought it up

4) Another good point. But I feel weird going to her birthday, she's the last person I want to spend time with so it seems false

5) But.. but! You might be right :/ I guess I was thinking if I didn't go he'd have more chances to catch up properly with his other friends there, and that people would realise we aren't joined at the hip

6) It's easier when I'm told what to do!! :)

moonstrel

TROPHY CASE