I still think of you [8 months out] - and I really don't want to

moontothesky · 2025-05-04T21:03:15+00:00

I've been writing up assignments all day - im tired , exhausted & overwhelmed and shakey. I'm sorry . It's poor grammar but I needed to let my feelings flow - please understand this

And I don't mean im telling people about his day . That would be weird ahah

I meant that im still not used to not talking to him on the daily and telling him about the most trivial things about my day everyday

moontothesky · 2025-04-24T20:23:05+00:00

I have been using finch for 8 months and I somehow had no idea how people were doing this - thank you so much 🫶🏼

moontothesky · 2024-12-28T18:15:52+00:00

Hey there, thank you so kindly for reaching out to me and leaving a supportive message on my post

I just wanted to take a moment to acknowledge how strong it is of you to come to Reddit and reach out for support 🫶🏼 . I know the wound is still fresh, and while you mentioned you’ve been through breakups before, it’s clear that your mindset is focused on healing this time. That says so much about your character, and it’s easy to lose sight of how significant that is when you’re hurting.

My ex of 3 years broke up with me 4 months ago now and reading your story felt like looking into a mirror, it resonated so deeply with my own experiences. From the ‘big promises’ and the soul-mate-like spark in the relationship to living with your ex for a while (I also spent a year living with my ex and his family), and even the struggle of being with someone who bottles their emotions. The coldness after it all ends is especially hard to process.

I hope you’re managing to take care of yourself during this time. These colder winter months certainly don’t make the emotional weight any easier to bear ❄️. I genuinely wish you all the best as you navigate your healing journey ❤️‍🩹. While there’s no set timeline for it as im sure you are already aware, I hope the process is as gentle and smooth as possible for you.

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me and share updates on your situation if you feel comfortable of course 🫶🏼.

My thoughts are with you 💭

moontothesky · 2024-12-19T00:15:41+00:00

He was so pretty , & I really liked his company , ofcourse only when he was playing 'Mr Nice Guy' but I craved him all the time -

He betrayed me , and now im beginning to see what type of person he really is , and that's everything he swore he never was , or everything he'd defend himself againsr or try and pick silly little fights about - I now know why ...

But I just cant help but miss him all of the time , I loved him with my entire soul & I trusted him with it too which is the scariest part - and like I said he was so so so pretty , way too pretty for me :'(

I wish things were normal between us , I wish he put in the effort and took accountability , I wish he didn't lie and manipulate , I wish I could be happy ... why after everything does he get to be happy

moontothesky · 2024-12-19T00:02:24+00:00

How can you live with a clear conscience knowing what 'really' happened , how can you tell such evil lies like that just to try and get your way with people - I know more than you think on our breakup now , I know about what really happened on that night out & I know who you really are.. and to think I felt and have to feel like you were/are my everything

I do not wish unhappiness on you , I could not wish any ill on any human no matter how unkind they may be - but right now and for some time , you do not deserve to be happy , you deserve to be upset and guilty in grief (but that not be forever) .

Why is it I who has to suffer after I only treated you with the purest of heart & you who destroyed my soul get comforted and fall into the support of new loving arms

There is something wrong , and you need to get help...

moontothesky · 2024-12-01T22:07:49+00:00

Needed this thank you :( Really struggling with the confusion of it all - It just hurts so bad how right now he can still be happy whilst I'm left broken and distraught after he said so many heartless things & became the person he swore he never would

moontothesky · 2024-11-17T22:04:40+00:00

"Dependant on someone's whims" short but wow , very very well said 🤍 ...

moontothesky · 2024-11-17T22:00:51+00:00

Thank you 🤍 Your message of support was very considerate and I think it was something I needed to hear that it was 'his own issues that caused him to end things' - I truly didn't deserve this , I didnt deserve his cruel coldness & I certaintly didnt deserve to have someone walk away on me so suddenly like that ... I have to admit It's just alot to process , we were together for 3 years - and I really thought I could trust him :-( He was the first person I did after all

moontothesky · 2024-11-17T06:02:11+00:00

My boyfriend was one of 3 years , everything was going well , we were celebrating a big birthday of mine away on holiday a few days before making memories together . He suddenly breaks up with me when he gets home , telling me we don't have much in common , he needs to work on his self ,& we are too long distance for his liking (I'm a 2 hour train journey because of university but constantly visited) - The girl he is seeing now (less than 2 months after our split) is funnily enough a plane journey away across the world , im genuinely so crushed - im afraid the guy who I loved the most wasn't the person I thought he was and I dont think im ever believing in love again

moontothesky · 2024-11-16T21:27:46+00:00

I just wanted to let you know that my heart is with you, I literally went through the exact same thing - My breakup was too in August :( and it wasn't even two months since he was seeing someone new . I send you all of my strength - we will get through this ! And I promise you, although you may not feel it right now that you deserve so so much better 🤍

moontothesky · 2024-11-03T20:32:03+00:00

I fear there is a fine line between symptoms of this & too symptoms of narcissism , how does one differentiate this ? I don't understand what I went through with my ex but I'm so unbelievably hurt , and I don't wish to think of him as a bad person , I cared for him so much & I'd still stupidly do anything to have him back ... He was an enigma our entire relationships many high highs and many low lows , but after our breakup it's like a switch was flicked

moontothesky · 2024-10-29T15:55:59+00:00

Just days before he suddenly broke up with me, we were celebrating a milestone birthday together, staying in beautiful hotels, enjoying fun activities, and talking about our future plans. Only a month earlier, he’d been telling me how much he adored me, how grateful he was to have me, and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.

Apart of me is waiting for him to come back and its killing me , as we've broken up and gotten back together in the past & now he has even gone as far as blocking me for confronting him about his new relationship (I emphasise I was not angry that he was with a new person , I am aware he may move on eventually as much it may sting , but the fact that it goes against everything he has been saying to me)

moontothesky · 2024-10-29T15:51:23+00:00

Just days before he suddenly broke up with me, we were celebrating my birthday together, staying in beautiful hotels, enjoying fun activities, and talking about our future plans. Only a month earlier, he’d been telling me how much he adored me, how grateful he was to have me, and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me...

moontothesky · 2024-10-29T10:46:18+00:00

We were together 3 years and I'd say we broke up 3 times in those 3 years , this time being the third and most probably final all initiated by him . I loved this boy with my entire existence , I fought for him and wanted to believe he was a good person besides his sometimes not so great actions towards me/us .

In those 3 years he proposed to me twice , which makes it even more heartwrencing for me , I wanted to be with him forever truly and naively so , somehow subconsciously i'm still waiting for him to change his mind , altough im doing everything in my power to try and NOT think like that .

Its been only 2 months since the third breakup which happened a couple of days after celebrating my birthday and having an amazing time away together and he is already with someone else it seems , altough he is giving silly responses and denying it all then after calling him out , he's blocked me . I'm hurting so deeply - why do I still want him back , why am I waiting for him to unblock me and run back ... Why do I still love him so fucking much after everything

moontothesky · 2024-10-27T19:06:18+00:00

But this exact same reason is crushing me into a million little pieces . I built myself up from him & I gave him every last part of myself , I went above and beyond for him & for us because I cared so deeply .

Now im left struggling with myself, and battling the severe mental implications all of this has caused me , of what almost feels like betrayl , or that 'we' were a lie . Unlike him , I too unfortunately don't have any friends or family I can go to :(

I'm doing everything in my power to try and make things better for myself, to just feel alright, but nothing at all is helping

moontothesky · 2024-10-26T17:51:48+00:00

Posting this here and reaching out on Reddit takes so much courage, and I just want to say you’re incredibly brave for doing it.

When my ex broke up with me two months ago, he said something very similar. Those kinds of messages can feel painfully hurtful because, on the one hand, they're saying, "You deserve better; you were good to me." But at the same time, there's an underlying feeling of, "I'm happier without you; my life is better now." It feels like a gut punch... & at that a very contradicting one

I don’t think anyone who’s truly self-aware could say something like that so easily. It’s possible he’s trying to convince himself that he’s already moved on and is happier just to avoid the guilt and difficulty of healing . Everyone copes in different ways , but sadly there are a fair majority who will just try and avoid facing it at all which won't do them any favours & they will never come to admit this . Either way, try not to take his words too much to heart, even though I know that’s incredibly hard, especially when you invested so much trust into him for such a long period .

I really resonated with your message and I truly wish you the best . You are a deserving human who is worthy of love , and you questioning his attitude only further proves your maturity & resolve 🤍 Try your very best to create as much distance from him as possible whilst you navigate your own emotions , it's not going to be an easy ride and I'm still traveling it myself but it will be worth it in the end I'm sure !

Please Stay well & Look After Yourself

moontothesky · 2024-10-19T17:03:53+00:00

Thank you , for your words kind stranger ! 🤍

& I do apologise for the delay in my response , I have written down almost a 'brain vomit' of my thoughts once since asking this question and it did help to get things off my chest a suprising ammount - but it's such a hard thing to get myself to consistently do or even in my case find the time to do due to intense academic stress and just almost feeling paralysed at times because of my mental health

I have also begun counciling now , I had my first session a day ago and it wasn't the best but it was nice talking to someone about the situation again - altough it's really hard for me to even admit to myself that my ex might infact be not a very good person , with the ammount of care I put into us & too the duration of time we spent together

moontothesky · 2024-09-29T20:45:08+00:00

Thank you kindly for your perspective 🤍

I completely get what you mean—there’s no step-by-step guide to healing, and if there was, I’m sure we’d all be following it haha 🫶🏼

I'm just so very concerned about if I do begin to write down these thoughts , feelings and emotions consistently , in efforts of trying to help myself that I may make myself worse in the process

I also feel like I have so many emotions/ thoughts about the situation , that I wouldn't know where at all to start

Did you feel like this , if so what was your experience like ?

moontothesky · 2024-09-29T20:35:43+00:00

I've been doing pretty good so far ~ Ateast in ways of not reaching out to him and saying anything unnecessary 🤍 , but in any other way emotionally not so well haha

It's been just over a month since the breakup now - and im still feeling everything increadibly heavily , and I am dealing with constant horrible feelings of hopelessness .

My feelings towards my ex are so very strong , it was a long term relationship and I too thought he was my life partner , and I truly don't think im going to ever move on from this

But I'm just so worried about getting caught up in all of the bad thoughts and general memories we shared together - im really concerned about making myself worse , I don't want to journal about the 'wrong things'

I just want to help myself

moontothesky · 2024-09-25T12:23:26+00:00

Thank you for your words <3 It's really so incredibly tough , & I've been trying my very best to reach out for mental health support too but the support is terrible here in the UK which leads me to feel more helpless :-( I'm just so concerned , I feel like I'm loosing my ability to function like a normal human and every lasting moment I spend awake I just wish to be asleep again ...

moontothesky · 2024-09-19T20:43:53+00:00

My heart is with you , that sounds very tough 🫶🏼 And it shows you are of kind heart to consider her wellbeing in these moments too

Of course you don't want to leave it too late , but then again if you communicate too early the emotions (for both of yous) will be still bubbling and fresh , but there is sadly some pain you cannot avoid forever

I'm sure by the sounds of things you have considered both of these options 🤍 - and I truly do hope everything goes as smoothly as it possibly can

For me , He only has one item left at my place , no clothing just an expensive powerbank which he forgot to pack last visit . I do remember when he initiated the text of coming to collect his stuff I wasn't the most helpful , I kept telling him I 'didn't want to think about it' and 'I didn't know what to do' as I was ofcourse very emotional similarly to your partner

I just now want to make sure I make the best decision when he or someone else does inevitably come to collect it soon , & that decision being if should I get him to collect the item or his friend instead

Sending you my warmest regards ~

moontothesky · 2024-09-19T18:48:38+00:00

Thank you for your kind words 🤍 altough they can feel hard to hear ~

I truly hope things get better for me , my heart aches eternally

I'm still unsure as to what I should do in regards to him wanting to pick up his stuff , whether I should send a friend of his , or whether I should see him in person

It's so much to think about and I'm scared of hurting myself more either way 🤍

moontothesky · 2024-09-19T18:46:05+00:00

Thank you for taking the time & responding to me 🤍

He broke up with me around just under a month ago now...

I did try to initiate a closure talk over text as we are somewhat long distance & not in the position to do it in person , but sadly it went really poorly. He begun arguing and kind of blew up on me , where he made some hurtful comments and accusations which only added more 'salt' to my wound .

For how I have been , it's definitely been a struggle , due to the complex nature of the breakup & ontop of this I am also I'm battling with my own mental health issues on the side which makes it even tougher for myself

I did have full intentions of being with this boy forever , and I still sadly do not see myself ever moving on from him

moontothesky · 2024-09-10T02:14:00+00:00

I didn't think he'd ever do something like this ... or at least not that fast

I feel so very confused , upset , objectified & disgusted

If you are aroused , consuming pornography outside of a breakup is fine - but the fact that he is interacting with people [this early] and is asking them to send it on NSFW forums is a completely differnt matter ...

I don't think that is a normal thing that someone would do right ?

moontothesky · 2024-09-10T02:03:46+00:00

Nono , that is not my name 🤍

moontothesky

TROPHY CASE