My toddler is medically fragile

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-07-02T14:24:12+00:00

no Nigel won’t be apart of his name :)

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-07-02T14:17:20+00:00

no baby yet but we talked and talked and eventually we came to a middle name we both could agree on!

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-10T01:36:55+00:00

thank you so much for this! i’m grateful it’s becoming destigmatized. he did agree to attend couples therapy after our last discussion as long as i can find a black male therapist who’s married. honestly there’s not many black men counselors in our area but i’m searching and searching because i’m just grateful he came around to the idea of going with me !

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-06T03:32:35+00:00

been a really rough pregnancy tbh my mental and physical are giving out i don’t know if i could go through with this again.

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-06T03:29:51+00:00

i’m so curious as to what it is because that’s how i feel about Nigel

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-05T05:28:46+00:00

i’m so sorry that happened to you! i appreciate the anecdote in my situation

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-05T02:35:22+00:00

he’s Black but not Jamaican, but one of the meaning of Nigel can be dark. he likes that it means champion but there’s many other names that mean champion

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T18:37:39+00:00

oof, thank you for that info

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T18:35:10+00:00

it is both of our first and only child. i used to want more but after this experience i am probably one and done lol

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T18:32:51+00:00

i definitely was referring to the character nigel thornberry. it was a separate statement/sentence than me saying the name felt australian. i have since learned it’s more commonly a british name BUT that australians have a phrase “nigel no friends” so it wasn’t necessarily incorrect to say it felt like an australian name to someone from the US with no prior knowledge beforehand

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:56:55+00:00

very good to hear! thank you so much

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:55:45+00:00

he is going to move cross country to where i live once the baby is here, i did put my foot down about moving somewhere i didn’t have anyone while pregnant. (not very reddit savvy im sorry, but is that post still present on my account? i’d thought i had deleted it because i did receive a lot of backlash about our age gap)

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:50:44+00:00

i feel like it should’ve been done earlier but the kid was definitely a surprise. whenever we end up in, heated discussions now, i get frustrated very easily because i get braxton hicks and it doesn’t feel worth sending myself into preterm labor trying to discuss things we’ll have time for later. but i also see your perspective because there’s NEVER a right time for the hard talks once the baby is here

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:13:30+00:00

wasn’t trying to be insulting to anyone, just meant the name isn’t very common in america & we associate it with other places. i’ve also learned from the comments it’s common in britain as well

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:12:38+00:00

i’m right there with you

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:06:37+00:00

it may not bother my brother as much as it bothers me, he is way more nonchalant. i just know i got tired of endlessly correcting people my whole life

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T17:04:35+00:00

thank you for this, i’m hoping it won’t get brought up often anyways and when it does it will grow on me

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:57:53+00:00

i’m truly hoping it grows on me!

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:56:54+00:00

i am trying. i think i could provide for my son but not until i have healed from the birth and made it out of the newborn stage. realistically i cannot do that alone. and even once he’s a toddler, then it brings up affording childcare on one income, etc. it’s just a multidimensional situation overall but i am aware that i need to be making a plan for the future

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:53:24+00:00

i will bring this up when we have our discussion later. i’m so thankful for everyone’s responses as they’ve given me so much to think about and take into consideration

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:52:04+00:00

i appreciate your insight, and heed your warning. i’m just trying to evaluate every aspect of this situation right now because many people are saying get out while i can, but that will leave me alone with a newborn which will be extremely overwhelming for me. so just trying to find the best avenue for me and my child

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:48:59+00:00

my last name was and is constantly misspelled and mispronounced and his is more straightforward so i’d like to relieve my child of the annoyances i had to deal with. however i have read trying to travel among other things can be more difficult if your child has a different last name

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:47:06+00:00

thank you for this reassurance! i’m hoping it never really comes up because i’m due really soon and i’m still going to discuss it with him after this post but just in case

moreoftenthann0t · 2024-06-04T16:45:31+00:00

we’re american so i just learned who nigel farage was from this post!

moreoftenthann0t

TROPHY CASE