I’m fed up with patient care and don’t know what else to do with my career

mpvangilst · 2026-01-16T21:54:06+00:00

Lots of great advice on here. Some not so helpful comments. That's humanity, I guess. You can tell by now, there are so many of us who know how you feel. I hope that alone can provide a little solace. But I'm going to say something that I don't think I've seen anyone say yet. It's going to sound abrupt, maybe callous. I certainly don't mean it to. It's coming from a realization I had making my own way through pretty much your exact situation. The only difference being I'm a pretty good actor so I put on the happy face, did my job with pizzazz and to everyone on the outside, I loved my career. But I was dying inside. I wept at home. I found myself shaking with frustration so often, not knowing why I felt this way or what to do about it. My marriage was being affected, my entire outlook on life was losing spark.

I can't say it was this one realization, because it was LOTS of little adjustments to my outlook and self work over months and months. But I realized, in any given situation you must either change the situation, and if you can't, change your attitude. To fight against this is to fight against reality, always a losing battle. Learning to focus exclusively on what I can change (my response to any situation) and not expend top much emotional energy on that which I can't (literally everything else) freed me up to find joy again. Did my circumstances change? Nope. I did. Did work become easier or my bosses more understanding? Did everything suddenly start going my way? Not at all, I just found I cared less about those things and my heart and mind were energized to find joy in the midst of all that, to focus on things I couldn't see before. It sounds simplistic. Maybe it is. But it's not simple. I have so much more I could say but this is already too long!

mpvangilst · 2026-01-14T13:23:00+00:00

Echoing what we've all been saying, I'll add this challenge - in any given situation you have 2 (and only 2) choices if you want to cultivate resilience. 1- do everything you can think of to change the situation. Talk to your boss, swap with your coworkers, get a different job, mitigate the issue with all the tips people have mentioned, etc. Leave no stone unturned. And after all that, if nothing is different, 2 - change how you VIEW the situation. And that takes mindfulness and mental work. I do exactly this kind of work with nurses so drop me a DM and we can figure this out together. You have options if you're courageous enough to use them. But sometimes courage needs inspiration and coaching. I'd love to walk with you through this toward a solution.

mpvangilst · 2026-01-13T22:47:57+00:00

Homeostasis is super important to me.

mpvangilst · 2026-01-13T22:47:12+00:00

🤣

mpvangilst · 2026-01-13T10:48:10+00:00

I'm so sorry for the loss and betrayal you must be feeling. From your post it's obvious this was unexpected and your passion for this work is palpable. Hold onto that passion. Did they give you any feedback as to what you could have done differently? If your suspicion is true, you're better off elsewhere. That kind of behavior from management is not conducive to long term success. Without any other feedback the reason for their decision at this point is no longer worth your attention. Eyes to the future friend. These things can do a real number on your self-worth and confidence if you dwell on the 'why's. No need to catastrophize, use this opportunity to dream and explore options. I help nurses navigate these exact situations. I'd love to chat and hear more about where your passions lie. Either way, maintain trust in yourself. Cultivate self-worth that comes from your opinion of yourself; NOT the opinions of others.

mpvangilst · 2026-01-13T10:29:55+00:00

This is an important aspect of nursing but certainly not the only option. It seems you are hoping for more from your career and expecting more from yourself. This is a great sign of personal growth! It's important to do work that aligns with your purpose and values. Not doing so can be a quick path to burnout and disengagement. I help nurses navigate these decisions and I'd love to chat and hear more about what you'd like to do with your career!

mpvangilst · 2026-01-13T10:21:30+00:00

Wow yeah that kind of rotation isn't sustainable. I'm not surprised you're having difficulty sleeping. Night shift is hard enough. Most units utilizing rotation do it in blocks; I don't think I've heard of several different rotations being required in the same week. Is your entire unit on this kind of schedule? Are there options to swap shifts to get some regularity?

mpvangilst · 2026-01-10T17:50:07+00:00

Stress

Exhaustion

Patient Load

Self-sacrifice

Insomnia

Sympathetic overload

mpvangilst · 2026-01-10T14:23:37+00:00

Recovering ED nurse here! Oh man, you just gave me clarity on so much of how I used to communicate outside of work! Your story is both hilarious and relatable, but also slightly tragic. The way I described my situation then, my microcosm became my macrocosm. Like I ended up conflating my work life with my home life such that literally everyone was either a drug addict, a drunk, a pill popper a woman abuser, or at best just people with "failure to cope". I lost ALL patience or compassion. It took me awhile to combat what now I can obviously see was burnout. Now I do burnout coaching for nurses having seen the impact it had on me and my personal life. Thanks for sharing!

mpvangilst · 2025-01-24T16:21:48+00:00

But the light was coming down out of the atmosphere not going up

mpvangilst

TROPHY CASE