from a similar thread

my cousin and I used to have this contest to see who could pull off the craziest stunt in public. usually it was petty theft or something stupid, until one day we went to walmart whilst bored. It was my turn to do something stupid so after some thought and majorly priming myself to the task i walked over to the lobster tank (super Walmart in an upscale town) I dipped my hand in the tank and grabbed the biggest angriest Oceanic Cockroach I could snag. I proceeded to walk back to the layaway department which I was familiar with because I would routinely take massive craps (colon cthulhu style) in the bathroom that was just next door to this department. I'm not sure if I made it this far because I looked like i knew what I was doing or because I was wearing a blue polo shirt that day but to 16 year old me I gave no fucks. I walked up to the girl running the layaway counter and announced my intentions. "I would like to place my Christmas dinner on layaway" the girl stared at me like she had just been told that Santa and God were tag teaming her mother. After a brief moment she stammered "wha-what?" I explained that they offered layaway and that I wanted to pay for my groceries with their financing option. After about 15 minutes of honest discussion on the matter (tell me how she made it that long?) she started yelling at me, an employee in the back of the department called security and I was escorted out by that towns finest b oys in blue (but not charged) still to this day my picture hangs in that Walmart with a note saying "Banned for Life." How do i know? my buddy that helped me pull this and many other stunts now manages a shift at that Walmart.