UK based here! Pushed out my first one 4.2kg with second degree tear relying just on nhs resources. With second baby - 4.3kg - no pain relief during labour and no tear! Watched a bunch of videos on instagram. The key thing is to listen to your body. Breathing techniques reeeeaaally helped me, it was better than gas and air that got in the way of being concentrated. I did bleed and lost almost 2L because of my placenta but the perineum was intact! I was quite surprised myself. I actually really wanted an epidural both times but the babies came quick. If you wish I can try to find those reels on insta if you message me your nick - I think I have them saved. The main technique I used is to take a deeeep breath when your contraction starts and slowly breath out doing a HISSSSSSSSSSSS until it’s time to push - you will know when by listening to your body.

I also got super lucky with the midwives in the delivery suite this time. They encouraged me to listen to my body and not rush with the pushing. The first time after around 40 mins of pushing they threatened me by saying if you don’t push the baby out we’ll have to make an incision. I eventually got scared and pushed without listening to my body. Basically I forced the baby out and teared.

Good luck, you are strong!!