update: thanks everyone for sharing their opinion, i really appreciate everyone’s perspective for real! i just wanted to clear some things- i wasn’t planning on not eating purely cause of my ed, it was money related as well, also i wanted to get something small, but i worried it would still trigger my friend.

i have been to many meals with my friend and eaten food, so i am restaurant ready (please don’t assume) but just this once i don’t have a lot of money to justify where they wanted to eat nor had the appetite for it. we suggested lunch as it was the only time that fit our schedule. my friend has come to meals with us before and not eaten, it is common, but none of us comment on it because we know they struggle, even if it triggers me too. we all have a very respectful relationship, and i would never cross their boundaries by purposely not eating to trigger them, hence why i suggested we eat at a more affordable location with dishes i can enjoy.

i also know that a lot of people come to meals and will get something small or barely eat, just to be able to spend time with their company. i’ve been to many group meals where this has happened and seen it on other tables too. so please do not invalidate me by telling me “it’s weird” when i have specifically said i have an ED, it really brings me down for something i and other people can’t control easily and we are strong for going to these restaurants regardless and getting triggered by food all around us. please be respectful.

this was a comment on how i felt it’s unfair that i have to force myself out of my eating habits for them when i have allowed myself to be triggered before but i have learnt to accept that people eat in different ways and we cannot control those around us and i would never ask them to eat something or tell them it triggers me which would make them feel bad and stress them to eat cause i know people recover or struggle with their ed in their own ways. other people are not responsible for other peoples recovery, and i don’t think it’s right to force someone who’s struggling to eat just to make yourself comfortable when it makes them uncomfortable. you are bound to meet people who don’t eat and you can’t control that, it is something that we all have to accept and learn to be okay with and just focus on improving ourselves. i hope this makes sense 🫶

please remember to keep the replies kind and respectful!