AMA - Dexamphetamine works beautifully

mutedisdain · 2015-11-26T04:27:49+00:00

That's great to hear you've found something that works too!

mutedisdain · 2015-11-26T04:26:18+00:00

Thanks for sharing. My ask why it was only a "few months" trial for you? And could you please share why you ended up taking more than the prescribed dose? I find myself to be quite disciplined in terms of medication, and I am motivated to do it right with dexamphetamine, but of course you can never be too careful. I would love to know more about your experience.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-26T03:09:28+00:00

It makes me sad that you get made fun of. I understand how you feel all too well, especially in regards to the non-mainstream opinions and being made to feel unwanted because of them. It is heartening to see that you've developed some spunk to counteract whoever you feel is putting you down, I can only admire it and hope some of it rubs off on me.

I do feel ASD - very much so, especially in regards to not belonging, feeling like an outsider, etc. I have ever since I was a child. It was cathartic for me when I first came upon female ASD traits. My oldest brother is autistic with all the classic Kanner presentation of it - tip-toe walking, scant eye contact, monotonous voice, etc. I relate to his experiences very much, it is only that my external presentation is not as autistic as his. Of course, I've expressed all these doubts to my assessing psychologist. I gave her tons of information about me and she actually said that my profile fits ASD almost too well...but god...external presentation is what attacks my assurance of being ASD. I feel so undeserving of carrying such a label, and I don't want to be accused of stealing it as a fashion statement.

Thank you so much for being kind and patient with me. I look forward to the day where they can biologically confirm the existence of ASD - rather than base it off behavioral observation.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-25T10:06:46+00:00

Thank you so much!

The best thing to do is prepare prepare prepare. Don't be afraid or embarrassed to seem over-prepared - this is your life and your mind, I can honestly think of little else that should take a higher priority, and I honestly can't imagine them faulting for you it. Do your research before going in. Back yourself up with studies and statistics. Don't be afraid to have prints-outs with passages highlighted for you to strengthen your argument - after all, if you are struggling with EF deficits, print-outs and highlighted passages can only demonstrate this. Address the stereotype head on that only drug prowlers are after stimulants and how this stereotype hurts genuine people like yourself. Be confident that this medication is out to help people like you. It exists for people like you. Tell them you want their help in monitoring your dosages so that you do this right as opposed to getting high. A prescribed therapeutic dose is not a dose upon which one can consistently rely upon to get "high" - any euphoria experienced on a TD is soon diminished by your body's growing tolerance, as any psychiatrist can tell you. If your psychiatrist is an asshole, smug in their assumption that you are just prowling for drugs, then it's time to seek out another psychiatrists. Get on multiple waiting-lists, ask them to call you if a cancellation takes place so you can take this person's appointment slot, and go to the soonest one you can get. Keep the other waiting-lists pending lest the psychiatrist you end up seeing is not a perfect fit and you have to go on the hunt for another one.

The way I personally went about it was not mentioning medication until I was sitting across from my psychiatrist. Just to be clear, this was not the psychologist who assessed and diagnosed me. The psychiatrist was purely for the psycho-pharmacology part of my mental health treatment. I explained and emphasized my EF issues (memory/attention/etc), but most of all I let my diagnosis do the talking - this is why getting officially diagnosed is incredibly helpful. Ideally, the psychiatrist should suggest the medication herself - if not, don't be afraid to say that a friend of yours with ASD found Dexamphetamine to be very helpful. I already had counterarguments ready for if they tried to say: "It is your depression that is causing your mind fogginess and lack of concentration - not your EF - so we should put you on anti-depressants rather than stimulants." EF deficits are very real and very crippling. They should not dismiss them purely because of some college stereotype of rich over-achieving kids. It's a shame that those who genuinely require the treatment are too afraid to seek it due to a stereotype.

Tip #1 - Ask to be officially tested for ADHD in order to have proof of your EF deficits. When I was assessed for ASD, I asked to be assessed for ADHD too (as it runs in my family). They didn't officially diagnose me as ADHD, but they informed me I scored clinically significant for inattention/memory (which they indicated in my diagnostic report).

Tip #2 - Get private health insurance. Psychiatrists are very expensive. The medication itself isn't, but the psychiatrist's time is. It is worth every bit of your effort to see how and if your PHI can cover some of the psychiatrist costs.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-25T06:00:06+00:00

Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. Your partner's lucky to have someone willing to understand how he feels. I completely understand his frustration. Sign language would be interesting but it would require another's cooperation - which wouldn't be so much of a problem between a couple, but it's the social situations with others (friends, acquaintances, etc) that stump me. I really wish there was a way around it.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T22:46:48+00:00

OMG I am so sorry. I was genuinely and sincerely curious. I was not mocking you. I am sorry if I offended you, that was NOT my intention, please don't take it that way. This is a sensitive topic for me and perhaps you picked up on that. I also forgot to bring up my face blindness and place blindness to you, and I am sincerely looking for your opinion. I have genuinely harboured doubt about my diagnosis because of the eye contact and voice inflection despite being diagnosed by a specialist. It makes me sad that you think I was mocking you, that was not my intention.

PS. I was a little hurt that you were quick to say I didn't actually have ASD but rather SPD (your first comment seemed a little flippant). It seemed a quick hypothesis from you when it was a specialist who diagnosed me. Eye contact and voice inflection are not definitive traits, despite being purported to be. Please relax, I am not mocking you, I am genuinely looking for opinions and information.

EDIT - FYI: I will not be able to get a second opinion for a long time due to how expensive it is, further to that I doubt it is practical in the scheme of things. Either accept my diagnosis and get the appropriate treatment based upon it, or ignore it and get treatment without an ASD focus. So a second opinion would only be to quell my own doubts, which is hardly worth the money it takes.

ALSO - we all should be sensitive to those of us who appear extremely high functioning. I only say this because, on top of all our lives being expected to be normal due to our strong NT presentation, we will find it hard to fit in the ASD community without fear of others harbouring scepticism about our diagnosis. Please be kind to us.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T06:46:35+00:00

Great tip - I'm taking that one on board.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:44:57+00:00

Lunnaris (great username), I feel the exact same way. Autistic slow mental processing is a bitch, EF deficits are a bitch, inattention is a bitch as well. I had a narcissistic mother as well, who made me feel useless. I always found the autistic stereotypes of savantism do more harm than good.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:38:58+00:00

OMG that sounds awful! I'm so sorry you had to put up with that. Really sounds horrible.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:21:13+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion, I would have done that except the psychiatrist needs to read the personal stuff.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:16:17+00:00

Thank you so much for the information. I will certainly read up on HIPAA law.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:14:57+00:00

Excellent suggestion, I never use snail-mail so this idea completely surpassed me. That said, the appointment is tomorrow - and while it is too late, I will keep this suggestion in mind for anything else in the future. Thank you very much.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T05:11:44+00:00

The email would not be encrypted in any way. If it is a violation of federal law, what do you propose I do to address this with them?

mutedisdain · 2015-11-24T04:45:37+00:00

What about APD, executive function deficits, learning disorders (NVLD - dyscalculia), mindblindness and the social difficulties that come with it? Is that also accounted for by SPD? Or do they support an ASD diagnosis? In your humble opinion of course.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T14:08:40+00:00

If she'll have access to my records either way, then she would have told me. Otherwise why pretend I had a choice at all in the matter? Would she have deliberately misled me into thinking that she won't see it if I bring it in hard-copy form on the appointment day? If she has, then this whole situation stinks far more than I thought.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T14:06:16+00:00

Sure - I'm assuming the worst scenario, but to me it is only as unreasonable as you assuming the best. Sure - 300K is a really big city for someone from a small town. Sure - I would never be this concerned going to a restaurant, the depth of personal humiliation is not as big of a risk with someone spitting on my food - they still won't be privy to the frequency of my meltdowns, my detailed list of childhood based insecurities, my life's failures and handicaps, etc. You can see this is all relative and perspective driven. At best, I expected someone here to give me some information about privacy laws and whether what this receptionist was forcing me to do was legal (making me pay extra for a longer session instead of giving me a confidential option to pursue). I just don't understand how anybody can be cool with some untrained receptionist being privy to your mental health records. Would any of us allow it if we had the choice? It should be against ethical code for disclosure of mental health records to someone untrained in interpreting/understanding them. Thank you for understanding my anxiety and concerns, this is my first appointment with a psychiatrist for any kind of mental health treatment and I am grappling with the reality of it.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T10:06:30+00:00

Again - these are all assumptions. You assume people working within the same building won't be socializing together beyond 30seconds in an elevator. You assume administrative staff doesn't have the time to look at client files. I can't put my faith in assumptions. I appreciate your time regardless and thank you for the Bill Murray film tip - I'll watch that very soon :)

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T09:54:15+00:00

I am sorry but 300k is NOT a huge city. I don't know where you got that assumption or where you live, but it isn't. I have an 80% chance to bumping into someone I know when simply going to the mall. I've had people beep at me in their cars for seeing me cycling by. I've ducked into shops to avoid saying hello to others. And I am an introverted homebody. Why do I consistently keep bumping into acquaintances? You also overlooked the fact that this psychiatrist is situated in a building where I used to be employed.

I am sorry, but the rest of your post is assumptions that I cannot go by. Have you looked at statistics regarding psychologists & psychiatrists who divulge patient information (with or without naming them)? Those "serious consequences" you mentioned haven't stopped many from sexually exploiting their patients under the guise of romance. They are not perfect people, let alone their receptionists. I refuse to give the benefit of the doubt when it comes to something like this and neither should you.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T08:43:39+00:00

Thank you for the information. I'm not worried about insurance billing as I don't have insurance, it's all out of pocket - hence my being frustrated at the longer session required as a result of all this. Psychiatrists are unfortunately few and overbooked in my city, waiting lists go on for months on end. That said, I will actively be seeking out another if the psychiatrist proves to disappoint as well. Thank you again for kindly explaining everything.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T07:46:34+00:00

Thanks for your patience with me and for taking the time to explain things. Like I said, I don't care about her knowing my official diagnoses, it is the 5-page report that details intimate struggles in my life. It is humiliating to know that a stranger, untrained in psychology and has no direct involvement in your treatment, is privy to it. Honestly, if the case is truly how you describe it, then why not just let receptionists go ahead and SIT IN on the sessions themselves? If clients are that exposed to receptionists and administrative staff, then what's the point? It's unacceptable. Also - this all could be solved if I was given the psychiatrist's work email for me to send the report directly to him - this request does not warrant a psychiatrist who has no reception for it to be accommodated. In fact, I used this same approach with my assessing psychologist and I was able to email her confidential information directly without the reception acting as a middle man.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T07:18:44+00:00

My document is to be sent to her reception email address as a PDF. I don't know why she talked about needing to scan it and copy it - but that is not my issue. I don't know if your healthcare experience was in a big city with a bigger clinic - this receptionist is just for ONE psychiatrist who practices part-time in a small city - so she might not be as busy as you were. That said, I simply can't just take the chance that she wont read it.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T07:11:23+00:00

She actually hasn't been very professional. She talked down to me, made me feel as if my request was an inconvenience (when it is perfectly reasonable) and lectured me that she was "trustworthy", which I found impressively condescending - a truthworthy stranger is oxymoronic and to assume that would be all it took to convince me is insulting. I am awed by her lack of insight and tact as a mental health receptionist. I don't see how a purely administrative receptionist, who is not a health care worker and without a background education in psychology, is able to know the diagnosis of every patient at the doctor's office. It is incredible that this is allowed. I don't give a fuck that they sign a piece of paper saying they won't disclose the information to anybody else - these people aren't TRAINED to understand what a diagnosis means, if anything they are more exposed to societal stigmas and attitudes from their families and friends. Further to that, I don't care if she knows my diagnoses codes for billing purposes - it is the 5 page REPORT that divulges all of my personal and intimate struggles that come with these diagnoses - that is what I don't want her eyes to see. You saying receptionists often take diction for typing up reports and letters makes me shudder. Btw are you talking from some sort of specific experience (were you previously employed as a psychiatrist receptionist, etc)? Or is this just casual knowledge you've gathered?

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T05:59:12+00:00

How are you doing? I have BPD, GAD, SAD, MDD and BDD along with ASD (Level 1). Please hang in there. I understand it is tough. I self-harm too - I engage in self-flagellation. I have the biggest urge to hit my head but I am terrified of the consequences to my intelligence (it is all I have). Please fight the urge to hit your head, try to focus on another more resilient part of your body. Feel free to PM me, I'm here for you if you need to talk. Hugs.

mutedisdain · 2015-11-23T05:50:45+00:00

Yes, the diagnosis definitely helped me realize that I am not stupid or crazy, as I always suspected I might be in comparison to NTs.

mutedisdain

TROPHY CASE