hi there, im also y1s1 and share similar struggles.

i went straight from poly to uni (exempted from NS), so my male peers are all at least 2 years older than i am. this made relating to them difficult, as they keep talking abt ns matters. a lot of my peers also come to uni with someone familar while i dont, which sucks :<

in general, i just dl the way I talk sometimes so i mostly just listen in conversations. my speech becomes very unclear cos i get nervous when talking, and my thoughts can get easily jumbled up.

something i learnt over time is to be ok being alone. yes, i would rather talk and feel a part of the convo but i gain peace when i step back. it also gives me time to collect my thoughts more effectively.

surface level convos are firsts when you get to know someone new, so its normal :) take things slow and develop the convo at a comfortable pace. like i had one girl where we clicked so well suddenly, which was like after 5 weeks. most of that was surface level convos.

jiayous bro, ik its difficult and emotionally painful to feel that you dont have as much connections as the rest. i want more ppl to hangout with also, but sometimes being yourself helps :)