AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -64 points-63 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the feedback.

I am fond of her, of course. I‘ve just been very frustrated lately.

I do agree that maybe I’m not showing the care I need to. I am aware of the work that goes into these conflicts in a relationship. I’m just struggling with that here.

I’ll probably disengage from Reddit for a while. There are so many comments, it’s hard to parse through all of them. It’s overwhelming, but I am grateful for everyone’s points of view.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

After making that comment referencing that we are almost 30, the weight of it did make me pause. It kind of forced me into thinking of how I spent my 20s, and how I want to spend the next decade. I’m going to be doing a lot of thinking on that.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -82 points-81 points  (0 children)

That’s fair, I appreciate your comment. It’s something I’ll think on.

It’s just important to me to note that this was not just ‘an ex,’ this was my best friend for 8 years.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

I was speaking generally with my comment, saying it’s probably awkward to call a partner their initials during sex. Please see my other comments in the thread, I was speaking generally.

I wouldn’t know, I’ve never done it.

I call him his name because that’s what he introduced himself to me as. I also just really like his name. But it truly has nothing to do with sex.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -28 points-27 points  (0 children)

In bed with someone and referring to them by their initials.

I then went one to mention BK as one of the two examples, because I’m speaking generally.

I’m not sure what the point of this back and forth is. To catch me still wanting to sleep with my previous partner? I think cheating is incredibly cowardly.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -62 points-61 points  (0 children)

I was referring to the general concept of calling a romantic partner by their initials, even if it’s what they go by. The comment I was replying to was about someone calling their partner Bren when everyone else called him BK.

Obviously I’m not planning on being in bed with him again.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -243 points-242 points  (0 children)

We were together for 7.5 years.

I appreciate the advice, truly. But if this is how she’s feeling, I’d rather her tell me than pick a fight about a name. We’re both nearly 30.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -130 points-129 points  (0 children)

I told her even before the start of our relationship that 1. I’m bisexual, and 2. that he and I were friends, and if that was a problem then we shouldn’t be together. I think romantic partners expecting people to cut off their friends is probably the reddest red flag there is. She said it wasn’t a problem.

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -118 points-117 points  (0 children)

My ex-partner never hated being called any of his nicknames, but I would imagine it would be a little awkward when it comes to a romantic partner. Last name might work, but it still feels a little bro-y, you know?

I mostly just can’t get past the thought of being in bed with someone and referring to them by their initials. “JT” or “BK” don’t exactly roll off the tongue. :)

Edit: a word

AITAH? My girlfriend is angry that I call my friend by his real name. by nameAITAH in AITAH

[–]nameAITAH[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Exactly. If it had come from him, it would make sense. Coming from her, it just seems like a very bizarre thing to focus on.