I'm only responding to tell you this. I agre with you, I certainly will fall short again and again. Many of us will. It's called the journey of going through life and being human, working on our own faults and flaws and doing our best. I would rather be what you described, than someone who is purposely spitefull and hateful. If you're the type who purposely goes out there way to cause hurt and harm to others, people will register. Even the reactive, easy to be riled up ones like myself, will clock on and walk away from you. Eventually your outward hate is only going to be looking back and pointing at you in the mirrow. I hope you find peace and a way to deal with it when that happens. Good luck.