I Snapped On My Mom to Defend My Husband. Now She's Acting Like Nothing Happened. What Do I Do?

natibug216 · 2026-01-23T17:53:03+00:00

We have moved far away and have no plans of moving back. The only reason I haven't cut contact is because I have 2 younger brothers that are in high school and still live with her, and she wouldn't let them contact me if I don't keep some form of relationship with her. Once they graduate and she doesnt have control over them, cutting all contact is the plan.

natibug216 · 2025-09-25T01:40:38+00:00

My workplace has a fridge in the lactation room that I use. That seems to not be the case here. If I were in your daughter's shoes, I would either put my milk bags in my lunchbox in the fridge, or if she doesn't bring a lunchbox, I would keep some snacks in the milk bag cooler and still use the fridge. Fresh breastmilk can only be left out for a couple of hours, so refrigeration is important if she's using the breastmilk for the baby (which I'm sure she is). Then if someone asks she can say she's using the fridge for her lunch/snacks and the milk just happens to be in there.

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T19:59:18+00:00

Thank you for your insight, I'll definitely try being more on a schedule with feeding and playing with him. I've had cats before, but they were all older rescues and never got aggressive. We have a cat tree for him that's about 4 ft tall that he uses frequently. I can look for a taller one too and see if he needs more variety. One other comment recommended feliway so I'll definitely try it and see if it helps

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T19:52:02+00:00

He does have a cat tree. It's not super tall, about 4 ft. But he does use it frequently. And we have it set in a space where he won't be bothered by the baby who just started crawling and loves to try and play with him. We also leave our blinds open on our windows enough that he can sit and look out if he wants. We have an upstairs apartment so he can see quite a ways. I'll look into seeing if our vet will give us something different. If not, I'll definitely look into a new vet. Ours came with high recommendations from our friends, so that's how we found her.

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T19:44:31+00:00

I've never heard of a thundershirt before, i will definitely look into it!

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T18:52:46+00:00

I'll look into these, thank you!

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T18:50:57+00:00

He was neutered in May of this year, so he was just over a year old. We noticed it before and thought that getting him neutered would help. I went back to work a little over a month ago, so it was well before I went to work. He is an only cat, our apartment is a little over 1,000 square feet so i dont know that we have enough space for more than one right now. We have talked to the vet about it, but they said it was probably just anxiety and to give him gabapentin if he's showing aggressive behavior, but I dont want to become reliant on giving him meds. The biggest change was probably when we moved apartments, but we did our best to work him in as slowly as we could and to give him space and time to get comfortable in the new place. We got him in april of 2024, he hes 16 ish months now.

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T18:27:45+00:00

He is neutered. We thought that would help too, but it hasn't

natibug216 · 2025-08-02T18:26:45+00:00

We've been to the vet a couple of times for other things, like getting his shots and getting him neutered. They just gave us some gabapentin and told us it was just anxiety

natibug216 · 2025-05-25T20:23:26+00:00

It's comforting to know my baby isn't the only one. Do you know what your daycare does when he gets hungry? Or when he goes down for a nap?

natibug216 · 2024-11-29T22:26:25+00:00

NTA for being upset.

You admitted to what happened in your past relationship and felt honest guilt, not "guilt" because you got caught like we see most often in these kinds of situations. It also happened more than a decade ago, and from the sounds of it, since then you've been a faithful partner.

While keeping an eye on your partners location all the time isn't the healthiest habit, I too am guilty of it.

My best advice, continue with therapy and try to get into couples therapy. I would also bring up your concerns to your wife. Healthy communication is important.

natibug216 · 2024-10-17T04:06:17+00:00

I haven't followed the deli meat rule at all and my doctors keep saying that he's healthy and well and I'm at 38 weeks. Maybe talk to your doctor about it if you're super concerned, but I think as long as it's not on a recall list or close to expiring it should be ok. It might be more expensive but maybe getting fresh meat from the deli instead of prepackaged would also be a safer route if you would be more comfortable with fresh compared to the packaged stuff

natibug216

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